Opinionated

Now That's Just Sad.

2011-09-18T18:48:00.002-02:00

As Mr. Ritter would say: "Pitiful. Just pitiful."

-Late

Have I Got Shoes for You

2011-08-08T17:29:00.001-02:00

Greetings, earthlings. I'm going to act like I've been posting with regularity, as to allow us to get on with the post. Mmkay, alright?

Where to begin? I draw in Moleskine notebooks a lot. One of the things I love doing to both conserve paper and make things look super-cool is to cram tons and tons of tiny drawings onto one page, as such:

(photo is courtesy of my Samsung Fascinate's Ps Express app...gotta love the blatant product placement. By the way, I'll take a check, Verizon.)

Just ignore the random scribbles...they honestly make no sense, even to me.

During the less than exciting classes (math), I'd draw in my spare time. Then someone would want to see. And then that other person would. Who would then tell their friend to check it out. Within ten minutes, they would have made rounds around the classroom, garnered a look of disapproval from Mr. Satyr, and I would be on the verge of a panic attack because- "WHERE ARE THEY? WHERE'S MY BABY!?".

Back to the story. But there was a certain someone who took a special interest in my drawing skizllz. This was Belzy. She approached me one day with an engaging conversation, a proposal, if you will (it's a world-wide punomenon!)- she wanted me to draw on a pair of white keds.

I'd been thinking of doing this for a while, but never had the initiative to actually buy a pair of shoes (the horror!)

I agreed and got to work with my magical bag of Sharpies. After about a week of really hard work, they were finished.

Viola.

She loved them, and wore them around the school. Within a day, I had tons of requests for shoes. And they were saying they'd pay for them! Squee! Although many failed to bring in shoes for me to draw on, two others did. I labored over these things, still only charging $20, which is insanely minimum wage (one person even had the gall to ask if I'd take $5...). During the beginning of the break, I did two more pairs of shoes for my aunt and my cousin.

For more pictures, you can go to my deviantArt page (there's a link in the sidebar) where I will soon have pictures of all the shoes.

Anyway, I'm still working out kinks in the system, but my next move is to make shoes for myself and wear them around town. I'm thinking Batman, Harry Potter, or Portal themed. Suggestions?

-Leighton

BZZZZZZZZ.

2011-03-20T16:23:00.001-02:00

I love Spring. The weather's finally nice and warm, but not blistering hot. Flowers are in bloom, the school year is winding down, everything is peachy. Not for me. Along with crippling allergies (and a slight case of Dramaqueenium), I have this...phobia. Of-wait, can you hear that? That buzzing? No, there's no way that's the laundry machine. Wait, why are you locking me outside-NO! NO THIS IS BAD THIS IS BAD THIS IS REALLY BAD THEY TESTED THIS ON MYTHBUSTERS YOU CAN'T CONQUER FEAR THIS WAY THIS IS TRAUMATIZING WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU OMG HALP HALP OMG HALP.

[has anyone noticed that my grammar goes out the window when I panic?]

If you haven't figured it out yet, I have an irrational fear of bees, wasps, hornets, what have you. When many people see them, they see cheerful, cute, hard workers. When I see a bee? I see a vicious, psychic, immortal, killer mutant.

They know when you're afraid (at least that's what my parents always say), so I'm wondering how advanced their mind-probing technology is (and how much time we have before the coming Apiscalypse [word play pwn]). I'll bet that they have all sorts of organic gadgetry in their silly little hives. Also, haven't scientists proven that, aerodynamically, they shouldn't be able to fly? They must be mutants gone horribly wrong. In mythology, bees are a symbol of immortality. No comment. Bees can and WILL take over the world (only after teaming up with Switzaii City, of course). It's only a matter of time.

But I digress.

I hate bees. They're scary. I can't stand going outside during Spring for fear of be(e)ing stung. At my dad's house, the walkway is borded by huge, beautiful, BEE INFESTED rose bushes *whimper*. At school, there are also some large, lovely, flowery trees. Let's just say that most Spring recesses I can be found running around like a chicken with it's head cut off, shrieking and flailing my arms about my person. Alternately, I can be found sucking my thumb in the fetal position under the bleachers. I'm very popular, you know.

Adi-OMG A BEE.

Oh, wait, it was just a guy on a bike.
(I'll take a check.)*

-Leighton

UPDATE: Was recently stung by a wasp, went through a bit of an allergy scare ("Did you bring an Epipen?""No...!""Are you allergic to stings?""I don't know!""Let's get you to the front office"). Completely intensified my fear, as I was minding my own business when it flew right up my shirt. That little-*grumble*

*Basically, if you're reading this blog and you don't know what that means, then, HOORAY! You're not a friend or member of my family/extended family, so that means I'm famous! Or I'm about to be spammed by a scary Chinese site that wants to know if I would be interested in "free offer ipad from Pear Computng."

Spectacular Spectacular

2011-03-20T15:02:00.002-02:00

Watched "Moulin Rogue!" the other night. Not surprisingly, I enjoyed it. What's not to love? Good music, Obi Wan Kenobi, Professor Slughorn, dancing movie theater attendants, and more. Here's a short list of my thoughts of the movie, because, really, they're all irrelevant observations that would otherwise be difficult to string together.

I want to steal Nicole Kidman's hair.
And voice.
Zidler is a scary conglomerate of Prof. Slughorn with a Felix Felicis OD, Carrot Top, and a cross dresser. Combined, we are...ZIDLER (Zany Imbeciles Dance Lithely and Evilly Resemble-Rodents)

In my mind, I kept seeing the Duke as Gabe from The Office. Sorry, Gabe. But you're just too creepy. I mean, seriously. Dwight is FAR cuddlier than you are (and that's saying something).
The gun (a literal Chekov's Gun) was stupid. It was like: suspense, humor, suspense, YAY, humor, DIE. Didn't work too well for me.
Two words: ELTON JOHN. Win.
The "Like a Virgin" scene is just about THE most disturbing thing I have EVER witnessed. Jim Broadbent...singing...Madonna...and scary dancing...*shudders*.
I wanted to see the Duke sing some Bee Gees.

...yeah, that's about it. Go watch it.

-Leighton

NAW, Vol. 1

2011-03-09T22:11:00.000-02:00

You know those times where something bad happens and you're all like, "NAAAAAAAAAAW!". Considering that I get a lot of these, I've decided to make some comics based on that. Hopefully this one makes sense.

Sorry for not posting in a month...I've just been busy. Which is the worst excuse ever, but I need significant amounts of free time to both enjoy it and blog. Anyway...I'll post when I can, but don't expect regular updates. I'm so sorry.

SHAME.

-Leighton

Original.

2011-01-31T20:49:00.000-02:00

At the Copa, the Copacabana, they urge you to have a banana. No, really. "Have a banana," they say.

I can really imagine Barry Manilow's convo with his producer or whatever...

BARRY: So I have "Copacabana...aaaaahhhhhAHHHHH...Copacabana...aaahhhhhAHHHHH."
PRODUCER: Very nice, very nice. The ignorant little saps will adore it, MHUHAHA *strokes evil baby kitten*!!!
BARRY: Great. What now?
PRODUCER: Something that will absolutely baffle our audience. They'll look so deeply for meaning, that they will destroy themselves in the quest *cuddles evil baby giraffe while chuckling with a dark inflection*.
BARRY:...what?
PRODUCER: "TALKING HAVANA". WRITE IT *lightning strikes*. I COMMAND YOU.
BARRY: *frantically scribbles, fear in his eyes* But, um, [gulp], sir, what, may I ask, rhymes with Havana?
PRODUCER: You poor [mentally challenged donkey], Barry. What rhymes with Havana? *gesticulates wildly* Louisiana, Pollyanna, bandana, Indiana, capital of Ghana, banana!
BARRY: ...none of those make any sense.
PRODUCER: *returns evil, physicist murdering cuttlefish into tank* WRITE IT!!
BARRY: *whimpers and scrambles to write* Yessir. Anything you say, sir.

...hmmm. Yeah.

-Leighton

I'M POSTING AS FAST AS I CAN, PEOPLE. GEEZ.

Bus Driver Does Not Understand Physics

2011-01-18T23:17:00.000-02:00

Dear Mr. Bus Driver Guy,

Please don't speed up immediately when I get on, only to stop abruptly right before I get to my seat (which is in the very back, thankyouverymuch).

Sincerely,

That Chick That Trips Every Morning

The Most Traumatic Birthday Party Ever

2011-01-17T21:03:00.000-02:00

Once upon a time, I was a toddler who had never been to a birthday party without my mother. My good friend's fourth birthday party was coming up, and her mom convinced my mother that I would be perfectly fine at the party by myself. Aheh. Oh, wait, was that foreshadowing? Hmm, didn't mean to do that. Anyway, parental unit numero uno dropped me off with a bunch of other psycho three year old girls. We were sugared up upon arrival, bounced off the walls for a while, bothered my friend's brothers (BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER), and when her parents got sick of us destroying the house, they sent us out to...the trampoline *dramatic music plays*. I was extremely jealous of my friend who not only had a humongous trampoline, but a ginormous back yard. We all raced through this big yard to the very back where the trampoline was. We hopped and jumped til we could hop and jump no more. One thing that I might point out about this trampoline is that it was very high up off the ground; so high, in fact, that we needed a step ladder to get up to it. After a while, my friend's mom poked her head out the back door and yelled "CAKE!". Note to readers: never, ever, ever get between a toddler and cake. Just...don't. Don't make a mistake. I happened to be at the back of the trampoline, and everyone shoved to the little flap, and bolted to the house. The last kid grabbed the stool. Gee, thanks. I was okay with this for a few minutes. I was all, "Suckers. I get more hopping time, so ha ha on you,". About a minute later did I realize that not only was it not very good that I was trapped on a trampoline without any way of getting down, but that no body was coming to get me. And that's when I started to panic. I yelled in the general direction of the house for a while ("GUYS?! HELP? HELLLLLP! HELP ME!!!"). It didn't help that there were some dark clouds closing in, and it smelled of thunder. So, I did what any normal toddler would do in this situation: I plopped down and sobbed dismally. I can't remember how I got back into the house, but once I did, the cake was mostly gone (and to add insult to injury, it was one of those horrible cakes where they stuff a Barbie into the center. I was so excited), and there were no flower candies left. People were even starting to leave. Luckily, I did get a gift bag, and I think I was appeased with a mini tube of Barbie lip gloss. However, I don't think my mom's anxieties were assuaged that easily...

Let's just say it ended badly.

-Leighton

Do Not Eat the Purple Starburst

2011-01-10T13:30:00.000-02:00

DON'T.

DON'T MAKE A MISTAKE.

A while ago, I found a two-pack of purple Starburst. Being a huge connoisseur of Starburst (If you get in the way of me and a pack of Starburst, girl, imma cut you. No, really. SUHKURRITY!*), I will eat any flavor you give me. The Starbursts were really pretty...lavender and stuff...apparently the flavor was "Passionfruit". Upon hearing that, some klaxon bells should've been blaring, because PASSIONFRUIT SUCKS. YES, IT DOES. I popped one in my mouth, chewed, and dry heaved a bit. To describe the flavor: Dawn dishwashing liquid (yes, I know from experience what it tastes like) mixed with the nastiest artificial fruit you've ever had the misfortune of entering your oral cavity (read: flavored water). The taste stayed in my mouth for the rest of the day. *shudders* That goes right up there with the most disgusting things I've ever tasted: chocolate peanut butter meringue cookies and guava/cream cheese on a cracker.

...toodles!

-Leighton

*Are Cairo and I the only ones who know what that's from???

Happy New Year/Happy Birthday

2010-12-31T21:37:00.000-02:00

A few years ago, on this very day, my dad and I had a conversation that proves just how spacey I can be:

Dad: Hi.
Me: Hi.
Dad: Happy New Year!
Me: Happy New Year to you too.
Dad:...
Me:...
*awkward pause*
Dad: Don't you have anything else to say to me?
Me: Uhhhhh....*thinks*....uhhhhh....I love you?
Dad: *facepalm* It's my birthday!
Me: *awkward turtle just had awkward grandchildren*

Happy New Year, and happy birthday to my daddy-o!

-Leighton

PS: For those of you wondering how old he's turning: he was born in 1997 *smirk*.

Lazy Daze: The Post That Doesn't Go Anywhere

2010-12-28T15:48:00.000-02:00

Well, I'm sure everyone had a totally and completely fabulous holiday without me.

...yeah, I haven't posted in a while. I'm sorry. Yes, I know I promised a bunch of good posts, but I've had a lovelytastic time doing absolutely nothing. I mean, there has been this nagging "you really need to do a post" thing, but otherwise, it's been pretty nice. And I hope you'll forgive me. I've really just been in a lazy stupor, likely induced by consuming copious amounts of hot chocolate and peppermint bark. I've been playing with my Xmas presents:

1. Magic Mouse: I didn't ask for it, so I didn't see it coming, but I sure as heck LOVE IT. Ohmigosh. It's amazing. Three words: one. Finger. Scroll. Go buy one. You'll see.

2. Sketchbook Pro: Technically, I don't really have it yet, but it's coming in the mail. But I do have the trial. Mere words cannot describe this program. I have graduated from complicated raster graphics software, and into the world of vector graphics. HALLELUJAH! I've drawn a bunch of pictures, so here's my favorite:

A screenshot of the amazingly simple program...and a cute pic of Harry Freakin' Potter.

Even though it's not that impressive, I just like it for some reason.

3. GIFT CARDS. Next year, ask for a Bath & Body works giftcard (unless you're a guy, because that would just be weird). They have a huge after Christmas sale. We got tons and tons of body spray and soap. It's awesome. Plumeria power! Anyway, iTunes, Walmart, and Barnes & Noble are leaving me pretty satisfied.

A big shout out and thank you to "Santa". Okay, this post is killing me slowly, so I'll put myself out of my misery.

Adios, and I hope I can post soon...

-Leighton

Last Christmas I Hated This Song...

2010-12-08T21:56:00.001-02:00

...AND I STILL DO!

And now, I shall endure 4:38 minutes of pure crapola. For you. You know you love me, and my masochistic ways.

(my comments are in green, the lyrics in red*)

(Synthesizer and "aAaaaAaAaaaaAaaaHhhh"s)

Kill me now?

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart

Literally? Because that's not only disgus-

But the very next day, you gave it away

To the hospital? Can you do that, legally? I don't think you-

This year, to save me from tears

How are you crying if you have no heart? That's physically impos-

I'll give it to someone special

You mean a certified cardiologist? Correct? But wait, how-*is drowned out by synthesizers*

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart

I'm not even going to continue the previous argument.
But the very next day, you gave it away

Refraining...this is taking all of my willpower, you know.
This year, to save me from tears

...MY WILL POWER JUST DIED. THIS IS AS IMPROBABLE AS IT IS-
I'll give it to someone special

-HORRIBLY COMPOSED!!!

*Angry ranting*

(musical interlude)

Oh, hey, why is there-*examines hand*-why is there blood? Wha-ha-oh. My ears. Ooooooof course.

Once bitten and twice shy

*is barely listening* Vampires? Really? You disgust me, Wham!*I keep my distance but you still catch my eye

Yet again, I would love to see a literal music video made.
Tell me baby, do you recognise me?

"Well, the last time I saw you, you looked less...um, well, honey, less...uh. Flamboyant! Yeah. That's the word."

Well, it's been a year, it doesn't surprise me

Yes, a lot happens in a year. Don't let the negative feelings for this song fester.

(Happy Christmas!) I wrapped it up and sent it

I'm confused. Sent what? Your eye? Your heart? What's next, your liver, fava beans, and a nice Chianti? Or will you go van Gogh and send her your ear? Any way you slice it (*general groaning at pun*), your lover is going to have some severe psychological damage.
With a note saying "I Love You" I meant it

That's what they all say.
Now I know what a fool I've been

Oh, maiming yourself and sending body parts to people? Nope, that's perfectly normal behavior (*grumbles* for Hannibal Lecter...)
But if you kissed me now I know you'd fool me again

...*confusion* but...I thought she wanted strange and unnatural gifts from her ex-boyfriend?

Chorus

My ears are now thoroughly gushing blood. "HEY, MOM! Can you take me to the ER?"

(musical interlude)

A crowded room, friends with tired eyes

This is typically the point where someone screams "Hey, y'all, watch this!", then an ensuing trip to the hospital, and then the Darwin Awards people give an honorable mention.
I'm hiding from you and your soul of ice

Why can't this be over already??My God, I thought you were someone to rely on

I thought I could rely on my trusty friends to say, "It's okay, Leighton, let's all go out and get chocolate milkshakes instead."
Me? I guess I was a shoulder to cry on

I'm in need of a shoulder to cry on right about...now. God help us.
A face on a lover with a fire in his heart

The literal implications of this song are hilarious. Someone, please make a literal music video...I beg of you...
A man undercover but you tore me apart

Bless the girl for trying.

Now I've found a real love you'll never fool me again

Are you going to give her amputated body parts, too? The lucky girl.

Chorus

Seriously considering to resort to absurdism.

A face on a lover with a fire in his heart

I hope he burns. *light illuminates face from below as I grin evilly*
A man undercover but you tore me apart
Next year

Next year I won't bother listening to this song.
I'll give it to someone, I'll give it to someone special

I feel bad for them. Wait, what are we talking about again?

*I need to give credit where it's due; the Purple Princess did this style of thing first in a hilarious commentary on the Biebenator's "Baby".

*Yes, I do realize that they're not discussing vampires.

-Leighton

To Tide You Over

2010-12-01T10:36:00.000-02:00

Hi, guys. I'm sorry I've been lagging on posts. Seriously. I'm going to give you a quick picture post now, as I'll be extremely busy up until Winter Break (I'll have oodles of time, then. Bwaha), and I am so terribly sorry. Never fear, though. I have a bunch of good ones lined up for y'all. Yes indeed...oh, right. The post. Whoops....

(I did this one a REALLY long time ago.)

I'm sure you could do this with any sport, but I used a shuttlecock because it looks like its wearing a dress.

That was lame. I'm sorry. I'll try to post whenever I can, k?

-Leighton

[don't believe that I'm busy? Try me. Literary research projects every other week, where we have to make a project, fine evidence that supports our hypothesis, write a review, and analyze the text. Furthermore, I have a huge science fair project that I'm working on (trifold, essay, and Powerpoint). Think that isn't enough? I'm also on the Science Olympiad team, about to be on the Literary Magazine Board, and on the History Bowl team. Booyah! Wait, that's not a good thing...:(]

splutter cough hack pant FAINT

2010-11-30T22:19:00.001-02:00

We had a surprise mile run today. Joy. I got my worst time yet at 12:30(my best being, like, 11:21, I think. Maybe...yikes), as I just gave up three-quarters of the way through. I'm still getting over a fun little cold, I stayed up late last night, and I didn't eat breakfast this morning. And three out of four of my running buddies were in health/sex ed, and the fourth running buddy is one of the fastest runners in my class. He ended up lapping me. Wah. Anyway, I become a wreck after the weekly mile run: Your hair was nice and straight this morning? Congrats, it's now frizzy and ratty! Was your body in a comfortable, warm, and dry state? Not anymore! Here, have some cold sweat! Your complexion was pale and relatively normal a few hours ago? Let me make it nice and ruddy for you! Oh, and here's some fabulous
l'odeur de corps (the French even know how to make "body odor" sound elegant *scoff*. I'll refrain from making a certain comment my dad just made. Suave, father.)! I can go from "decent appearance" to:

"What the HECK did the cat just drag in?"
"Is...is it...dead?" *pokes me with a stick*
"Nope, but it sure smells like it!"
"HawhawhywhohowwheWHAT? Heeeeey! That wasn't nice-*sniffs self*-actually, that wasn't accurate. Imagine if a rafflesia flower and a dead skunk procreated. THAT is what I smell like, unfortunately."

Where were we? Oh, right. I wish I could enjoy running. I wish I could be elegant and graceful while jogging. No such luck. Until then, I'm-

The Perpetually Sweaty Sprinter,
Leighton

(also, I apologize for the font size. I had to copy/paste something, so I had to change the font size, and then it wouldn't go back to normal, and...ugh. Darn you, Blogger fonts!!

Merry Thanksgiving!

2010-11-25T12:28:00.000-02:00

Hey, guess who I'm thankful for? YOU GUYS! You're awesome! Now go stuff your faces. I know I will.

Adios,
Leighton

[yeah, it was intentional]

The Process of Listening To...

2010-11-22T21:39:00.000-02:00

Justin Bieber. Who else?

Thank goodness sound doesn't travel through tears well.

*phew*

-Leighton

Chart of Happines

2010-11-22T21:29:00.001-02:00

The lovechild of boredom and a tablet.

I was really bored yesterday and made a couple of charts like those "pain scale" charts. I made this one for happiness.

(go from top left to right, then to bottom left to right; it's only logical)

1. Not happy, not sad. Just meh.
2. In a good mood.
3. In a very good mood.
4. Happy enough to the point that you might be creeping others out. But you don't really care.
5. Legitimately high on life. Nirvana. Bliss. You might feel like doing something reckless along the lines of giving someone a bear hug, or randomly kissing someone. Also can be considered the last healthy stage of being happy.
6. You are so happy that you are vomiting rainbows, glitter, and butterflies. This is unhealthy, and 9 out of 10 doctors recommend that your happiness stays below this level. The tenth doctor enjoys the taste of rainbows. He says that they taste like Skittles. No comment.
7. At this point, your heart is racing, your bladder is prepared to burst, and you're spluttering chortles and giggles. It has been observed that some Level Seven Cases end with the victim choking on spit. Not a fun way to go.
8. The bladder has exploded, and you no longer have the capability to laugh.
9. Also called the "imminent gory death stage," you become vaguely aware that you're about to-
10. -explode into rainbowy, glittery goo.

...the end!

-Leighton

[that was lame. Sorry.]

It Just Got All Festive Up In Here

2010-11-21T18:22:00.000-02:00

Oh, yes, my friends. I'm doing a festively awesome redesign which I hope you all will enjoy. Post-holidays, I'll probably go through with the real redesign as promised. I'm open to any and all cosmetic-related suggestions!

Thanks, guys.

-Leighton

So Many Movies, So Little Time

2010-11-21T16:38:00.000-02:00

We recently signed up for Blockbuster's version of Netflix. It's pretty awesome, and we get free movies from Blockbuster anyway purely because my mom is so pleasant and kind to them. Anyway, we've pretty much been watching movies every night. Since I didn't LOVE or HATE any of the movies, here are a bunch of short reviews:

Princess Mononoke

To be frank, I dont understand why this is on the Top 250 IMdB list. The plot is disjointed and confusing, there's virtually no character development, and the message-while I completely and totally understand where they're coming from-is something we hear enough of anyway. First off, I don't like anime. I don't understand why. Anyway, I liked My Neighbor Totoro (trippy, but cute) but Princess Mononoke just didn't do it for me. There was a lot of violence for an animated movie (it is PG-13, just so you guys know), and my mom up and left after the first decapitation. Anyway, the message: save the environment! Hooray! The characters are a healthy mix of stereotypes and really trippy stuff (creepy rattling forest critters, anyone? No wonder weird guy freaked out when he saw them.): handsome, talented lead, spunky heroine, comic relief dude, and then the forest spirit. Uhh. Did he give anyone else nightmares? Okay, I'm seriously getting off track. While this movie was stunning visually, the plot was bland and confusing. Stay away unless you are a.)fluent in Japanese and can watch the non-Miramax dubbed version (apparently, a lot was lost in the translation) or b.)a big anime fan.

4/10

Diary of a Wimpy Kid

First of all, I hated the book. It wasn't that interesting, the humor was stupid, and I don't understand its popularity. Plus: a new one? Really!? Anyway, the movie was pretty awesome. There, I said it. It was awesome. I didn't even care how predictable it was (partially because I read the book, what, three years ago?), it was really cute. There was even a point when my mom was like, "Is this your life?" mostly talking about the Angie character (who I don't think was in the book) saying "we're the voice of the people making fun of the people." My mom and I loved Roderick, who was totally evil. And since "Total Eclipse of the Heart" made an appearance, it got extra rad points. Ultimately, my mom cried. Yes indeed. 'Nuff said.

7/10

Sixteen Candles

My mother is a very forgetful person. Or maybe she just has a selective memory. It's odd, because she happens to forget the nasty bits of movies. Like this one. Kind of my fault, since I didn't check the parental advisory on IMdB. For those of you unaware, there hasn't always been PG-13. You see, they created it when Temple of Doom was released so child fans of Indy could...*ahem* Sorry, I'll stop boring you. Anyway, this movie came out before that. So it's PG. When it should really be somewhat heavy PG-13. Yeeeeah. I typically grill my mom to make sure the film is appropriate. This time, I didn't. So imagine our surprise when an f-bomb is dropped five minutes in? Heh. SURPRISE! My mom didn't remember that. And a bunch of other things. Anyway, I liked the movie. It was cliche and predictable, but it was funny, and there were a few cute guys (always helpful), and it was well written.

7/10

...and now, I shall go do things. Hooray?

-Leighton

Eek, Braces!

2010-11-18T22:33:00.000-02:00

I'm sure you probably would assume from the title that I got braces today. Rest assured, I didn't.

But...I get this sneaking suspicion that I'm next.

My friend, Puppy, we'll call him, got braces a few weeks ago. Then, my other friend, Gaza, got braces today. They look good on both of them, and their miserable smiles were somewhat ironic. Remember how I had that problem with my canine? Yeah, it still hasn't come down yet. I've talked to a bunch of girls (dentists, even) who have said they had the same problem and got braces. I'm scared. I think I'm next on the hit-list. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah. In case you didn't hear me, AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!

Wheee.

And now, to watch Princess Mononoke/ To Kill a Mockingbird.

-Leighton

Bashing Eclipse Mercilessly and Getting a Grade For It

2010-11-17T10:42:00.000-02:00

On Friday, I have a Literary Research Project due. Fun. My project prompt was "Write about your character's life twenty years from now." Obviously, I chose this for none other than Eclipse. Here's my (non-edited, non-revised) essay thingy so far:

Eclipse: Happily Ever After?

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

“Edward, I want a jackalope.”
“Dearest, that might not be possibl-”
“It had better be chartreuse, and its fur has to be made of pure silk.”
“I-I’ll, um, go genetically engineer one right away.”
“Why are you still here? Get me my jackalope!”
Edward rushed out the door, eager to meet his wife’s demand. Bella sank into her cashmere upholstered love-seat and turned on the plasma flatscreen mounted to the wall. She began to channel surf, turning up her nose in disgust at the lack of things to watch, despite the fact that she had access to over 900 channels. Settling for QVC, Bella watched as an overly-peppy woman gabbed endlessly over a diamond necklace. Quickly tiring of bleached smiles and solicitors oozing cheer from every pore, she found a somewhat interesting program featuring a monkey and a televangelist. Growing impatient after only five minutes of Edward’s departure, she gnashed her teeth. “WHERE’S MY JACKALOPE?!” Bella shouted in frustration. “Edward’s busy genetically engineering one, but he’s having some issues creating the right hue of chartreuse. By the way, Edward says that you shouldn’t take the safety guards off of the cabinets. They’re only there for your protection,” Alice said as she gracefully strode down the grand staircase holding a pile of designer clothing.
“But, Alice,” Bella whined, “I’m not going to cut myself on Post-It notes anymore! I’m a vampire! I’m...INVINCIBLE!”. Alice feigned an awkward cough. “...anyway, I bought you some one-of-a-kind angora sweaters! See, they’re even hemmed in platinum thread! Cool, huh? Also, you’re going to-” Alice stopped mid-sentence, her typically penetrating gaze softening to a glassy look. Bella examined the tops, waiting for Alice to come out of her reverie. There were four, each of which had price tags over the $200-mark. Hideous, she thought. Positively disgusting; those colors are out of season. Purple? Orange? Really? Alice is such a--the aforementioned vampire snapped out of her vision, continuing as nothing had happened. “Just to give you a heads up, I hate Coldplay, so there’s really no need to buy that CD you were planning on giving me for Christmas. So, do you like the sweaters?”. Bella piled them up and handed them back. “Alice, these are atrocious. Give them to Goodwill, or something. Alice’s smile faded. “Okay, then. Fine.” She trudged dejectedly back up the stairs. Bella rolled her eyes and pulled out a compact mirror. She admired her flawless, sparkly face and luscious hair for the greater part of an hour. Seemingly mesmerized, the spell was broken when her wafer thin cell phone chirped.
“What?” Bella answered grumpily.
“Hi, Mom!” It was Renesmee, Bella’s eternally cheerful daughter (a trait I’m positive she didn’t inherit from either parent)
“Hey, Nessie. Can you change my ringtone when you come over? It’s so annoying. I hate it. It’s so...cheerful.”
“Yeah, sure, Mom.”
“Why did you call me, again?” Bella complained.
“Just to check on you, and tell you that I love you!”
“Meh. Bye,” Bella said as she snapped the phone closed.
A couple of miles away, Renesmee stared dejectedly at her cellular. Sighing, she turned to Jacob, her husband. “Okay, hon, I’m going shopping now,” she muttered, grabbing her purse. “Fine. I just don’t understand why you keep going, you have enough skirts to clothe all of the local Girl Scout Troops and then some,” Jacob replied sullenly.
“There are some leftover tacos in the fridge if you’re hungry.” Skillfully avoiding Jacob’s question, she scampered into the night, her pale skin glowing in the darkness. She didn’t intend to tell Jacob that she was going to therapy. Nessie had some role confusion doubts about Jacob, as she had been under the impression that he was her brother for the first portion of her life, and then they suddenly were married. This is why you don’t let werewolves around newborns, kiddies. It seriously warps them.
Anyway, back in the Cullen household, Edward was sneaking around the back of the house, leading a seemingly lime-green behind him. “Here, mutant creature, come see pretty Bella! Do you want a sugar cube? Mmmm, sugar!”. He coaxed the unusually soft quadruped through the back door with a lump of sucrose and into the den where Bella was rereading Wuthering Heights. Upon noticing his arrival, she leapt into his arms and they made out for five minutes. Afterward, Bella scrutinized the jackalope. “Is this it, honey?” she said through clenched teeth. “He’s beautiful, isn’t he?” Edward replied. “It’s amazing what can be accomplished in a petri dish, eh, Bells?” he continued. Bella stared, awestruck, at the uber-soft urban legend standing before her. “Did I not specifically say that I wanted a chartreuse jackalope, Edward?” She asked, her rage barely contained. “Dearest, she matches the color swatch perfectly. ‘Yellow-chartreuse, see?’” Edward whimpered, cowering in fear before his spouse (who has been known to break expensive furniture when displeased) and fearfully brandishing a scrap of colored paper. “Yellow chartreuse? YELLOW CHARTREUSE!?” Bella shrieked, grabbing the paper and ripping it into monochromatic confetti. “You moron! You dolt! How dare you! I wanted GREEN chartreuse! Ugh! I HATE you!” Bella went on a rampage, screaming and smashing priceless items, among which were one of the last remaining Fabregé Eggs, an extremely fragile copy of the Gutenberg Bible, and a framed autograph from William Shakespeare. Edward watched in patient and mortified silence. He had just auctioned off that same Gutenberg Bible to a museum for forty million dollars. The Smithsonian would not be too happy about that, for sure. Bella cooled down after a little while, but the loft was trashed. She plopped down on the couch and stared off into the distance. “My life is horrible,” she said loudly. Edward sighed. “Honey, it kills me to hear you say that. You have a wonderful daughter, you’re insanely rich, you’re beautiful, you always get everything you want, and a million teenage girls would gladly amputate a limb to be you. Your life is perfect!” he murmured, hoping to cheer her up. Bella began to sob, and between her tortured wails, Edward caught a few things like, “Why do you hate me?” “What did I do to deserve this?” and “All I wanted was a jackalope”. After an uncomfortable and awkward half hour of back-patting and reassuring statements, Edward decided that Bella was a lost cause and released the jackalope into the woods.

THE END...?

(probably not, as I need to fix things and add something about Charlie. Heh.)

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

So, yeah. Apparently, we have to present our books in a totally positive light, so I'm planning on being 100% sarcastic. Mhuaha.

-Leighton

Saved by the Buzzer

2010-11-16T21:38:00.001-02:00

Gym. My least favorite class, as I have the athleticism of a boulder [read: I fail at sports], yet, amazingly, I have an A+! Cool! Anyway, here's a super list explaining why I strongly dislike gym.

-Exertion.
This is coming from a girl who hates sports, sweating, and any physical activity besides ping pong (and a few other things I kinda enjoy). School shouldn't hurt you physically. Pushing pencils makes your hand cramp, and that is the most pain you should feel on campus. Why is gym allowed, then? My muscles are typically reduced to the consistency of jello thats been sitting in the sun for a few days after class.

-Scent
I think that it's a cliche that gyms smell like sweat and socks. Lemme tell ya something. Gyms have a heinous potpourri of Axe, rubber, cheap perfume, and Chick-fil-A. Why, coaches, must you buy the softball team fast-food? You're making me drool while doing sit-ups. That's not a good thing! Grr.

-Projectiles
I don't deal well with flying projectiles. My heads seems to be a magnet for them. Since the beginning of my relatively short life on earth, my head/face has attracted softballs, basketballs, dodgeballs, soccer balls, water bottles, shuttlecocks, wadded up pieces of paper, and a bunch of other things. I'm just thankful I haven't been hit in the face with a football yet. But I digress. Anyway, they're everywhere in gym, and no matter how hard I try, I cannot prevent my head from being so promiscuous. Chastity-hat time, head! And, if you wanted a cringe-worthy pun, I suppose you could say that the balls have been hitting on my head! Geddit? Hey, why are you throwing rotten produce at me? Waaaaaah.

-Coaches
The coaches are just...well, they're kind nice sometimes, but they're not exactly the most even-tempered people I know. They blow up easily. Yeeps. Luckily, I've never been the subject of one of their rants, but one of them did look at me patronizingly and said/raised voice "GET OUT OF THE DOORWAY!". Mehhhhh.

...and that about sums it up. I'd write more, but I've been simultaneously working on a fun Twilight project which you'll get to read in a matter of time. Hooray!

-Leighton

Our Teachers Discuss Us As They Would a Dead Body

2010-11-16T21:04:00.001-02:00

Alternatively titled "I Think My Teachers May Have Affiliations To The Mob," but I could probably get in trouble for that, as it is quite difficult to determine when one's being sarcastic over the interwebs. Indeed.

Anyway, it's no secret that a majority of people in my grade are...to put it nicely, rather unintelligent. Remember, that's putting it nicely. And our teachers know it. In my (slightly more advanced, however it disturbs me that most students in the class are considered advanced) science class, we've been learning about Continental Drift and yaddah yaddah yaddah. A couple of incredibly bright questions were asked today:

"Does (our state) have any volcanoes?"
"If water....could get down into the lithosphere...what would happen?"
"What would happen if we sent a bomb into the asthenosphere?"

On a somewhat unrelated note, Applesauce (genius nickname for my sci teacher) also said some interesting things earlier. Heh. Yeah.

"Gadge, you're the most normal person in the classroom today. That's not a good thing."
[I agree 100%. Gadge is incredibly intelligent, but he scares me a bit with his extensive knowledge of/morbid fascination with guns/hunting/bombs/NASCAR]
[on the topic of how you die in space] "That's an easy one. If you were in my class in 6th grade, you'd know this, but it would take thirty seconds for you to die. *leering and smiling creepily* First, your eardrums would burst, next, your eyes. Then your arteries and veins would explode. Your lungs would expand and ultimately burst. By the end of thirty seconds, you're dead. Lemme put this in perspective for you *pulls out watch*. Thirty seconds starting now: *couple of seconds* You're still alive! Hee hee hee. *couple more seconds of creepiness* You're still alive! *couple more seconds* Aaaand...you're dead! And that's how you die in space. "

Yeah. In other words, I love my science class. I just don't like my peers all that much. Did I forget to mention that the lowest grades are 11% and 14%? Yeah. Anyway, I know I just got really off topic, but I'll get on with it.

So, I had to stay after class today because we needed to get my grades into the roster because I'm new and blah blah blah. So, my social studies teacher, Lib, comes in. Applesauce is like, "Hi, Lib. Our students are really stupid. You know what one of them asked today? 'Does [our state] have volcanoes?'" And then he was like:

Lib: Oh, all mountains can be volcanoes.
Applesauce: *to me* Get your rock cycle sheet.
Lib: These kids are so dense, especially my homeroom.
Me: *gets offended, and then realizes that that statement is sadly accurate* Rock cycle sheet? This one?
Applesauce: No, the other one. Anyway, maybe we should do something about it. I was thinking of *see footnotes for details*.
Lib: Maybe. I'll get White and Grass to see what we can do. Hey, have you seen that NYT thing...?
Applesauce: Okay, Leighton, you're good. And you have a 100, what a shock.
Me: *smirks, grabs binder, and leaves*

Arriving in the studio [read:10x10" with two computers, a couch, a green-screen, and SMoC*], I realized that I had forgotten my bag. Since today was a pretty slow day involving the tedious task of helping write everyone else's copy [read: be a thesaurus, come up with witty phrases, and get OCD about poor grammar. Seriously. I'm the Word Nerd. How dare you use such awful conventions in my presence? And don't say that I should tell them, because they say it doesn't matter because no one will see it. Meh. Oh, great. I'm rambling parenthetically. Joy]. Anyway, I headed back to the (my grade) wing and watched as all the eighth grade teachers flocked into White's room. I heard snatches of conversation like "-do something about it!", "-so stupid", "-class changes". Basically, this can mean one of two things:

-Possibility A: My teachers are currently planning how to dispose of a corpse.
-Possibility B: We're likely to be throughly admonished for being moronic tomorrow morning. While I agree that action is necessary 100%, but for the love of Pete, teachers, DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. We (intelligent children) suffer from the majorities' stupidity as much as you do! You're not the strong little martyrs in this situation! I know that there are limited options that are available for dealing with this kind of thing, but at least let us skip out on the screamed tirades about how children today are lazy, addicted to drugs, texting crazed, and are losing brain cells on Tweeterbook! I can't count how many times teachers have pulled me aside after one of those and said "I know you're not included in that group because you're a good kid, and I'm really sorry you had to sit through that." GAH! If you were actually sorry, you'd let me do something productive instead of listening to you preach to people who think that's it's amusing! Rant over, sorry.

Uh, yeah. Breaking news: teachers think we're stupid. Heh. News.

Adios,
LG

*SMoC: (noun) Sprawling mass of crap. As in: Onyx, please move your sprawling mass of crap off of the table. Term coined by Onyx himself. Ironic.
**Footnote I mentioned: That whispery thing adults do when a kids around. Sort of like when there's a toddler and the mom's talking to her friend.

Toddler: *throws a tantrum*
Mother: I think someone needs a-*goes behind toddler and half mouths/half whispers*-NAP.

It really bugs me. Whispering loudly or mouthing: pick one! Seriously, if you're doing the whisper, we can hear you! Geez.

Fin

(*looks back over post* Wow. That was both rambling AND inarticulate. Congrats, Leighton. You've stooped to a new low.)

[UPDATE: Alright, fine, parental units. You give me no choice. I realize that I sound cocky, am isolating myself from my peers, and that stuff that's online is online forever. Um. Duh. First off, why, yes, I am cocky, thankyouverymuch. Heck, you could go as far as saying that I'm somewhat narcissistic(and that'd be correct), but at least I'm not condescending to people. I'm polite and affable most of the time. Second (hooray for elementary transitions), ever heard of a hyperbole? There are a bunch of very intelligent, talented people in my classes. And then there are the people who aren't the brightest crayons in the box, and they acknowledge and embrace that. But saying that a majority of the people in my classes are morons isn't true. It's for comedic effect. Third, I'm really only putting this disclaimer here so colleges/employers/colleauges/classmates don't think of me as a cocky, elitist, opinionated, jerk. Grazi.]

Random Doodles

2010-11-11T18:46:00.000-02:00

Something to tide you over while I work on real posts.

-Leighton

drools

2010-10-30T12:14:00.000-02:00

Oh. My. Gosh.

This looks so COOL!!!

Basically, it's a haunted house. But steampunk'd (darn it, Blogger, STEAMPUNK IS A WORD!!!). It's in New York City, and it's times like these that I really wish I could Apparate. From what I can understand, you're given a lamp and are allowed to roam through the labyrinth of mechanics, gears, and Victorian garb. I like that there's absolutely no blood and gore, and it's more like an unsettling psychological thriller. I applaud you, Steampunk Haunted House!

[and I really wish I could Apparate...humph.]

-Leighton

Explode Into Rainbows. Do It. Do It Now.

2010-10-29T22:52:00.000-02:00

The aftermath...

Watch this video. If the combination of amazing song and "aww"-tastic video doesn't make you explode into rainbow colored mush, then your heart is as cold as stone, and you are a waste of carbon [kidding, kidding...or am I?].

And on that note, have a fantabulous weekend!

-Leighton

Coding Fun, HOORAY!

2010-10-25T21:20:00.004-02:00

Hey, y'all. I'm not much of an html geek, but I've recently found some relatively easy coding stuff that's actually...fun!

How to Edit ANY Webpage

Paste the following code after any url. Just so you know, the changes are not permanent. I repeat, not permanent!

javascript:document.body.contentEditable
='true'; document.designMode='on'; void 0

So glad someone finally acknowledged how awesome I am. Thanks, NYT! I kid, I kid.

How to Make a Scrolling Marquee Like This One!!

I'm going to warn you guys that marquees get really distracting. If you use the code, make sure you only use it for things that are really important like, "Blog Self-Destructs in Ten Seconds!" and "World Chocolate Supply Dwindles! Chaos Ensues!"

Anyway, here's the code.

>marquee behavior=”scroll” direction=”right” height=”36″/marquee<

Just replace all of the < and > with their opposites [otherwise you'd only see a scrolling marquee, LOL] put the text you want scrolling where it says "Your Text Here!"

Cool, right? Have fun with it, guys!

-Leighton

This. Is. SPARTA!

2010-10-25T21:10:00.000-02:00

300 Posts.

Holy-freakin'-cow.

Since this day last year, I have posted 300 times.

All thanks to my ever loyal readers.

You guys are the best.

Know why?

Because.

This.

Is.

OPINIONATED!!

-Leighton

Indians ft. My Mom

2010-10-25T21:08:00.000-02:00

Hello, there. For lack of something better to do, I'm going to interview my mom. The topic? Indians.

Me: Hi, Mom. Can I interview you about indians?
Mom: I've got ten minutes before my show comes on, so, okay. Lemme get my water-
Me: [sigh] Okay. Indians. What are your opinions concerning indians?
Mom: Well, they're scary. Especially when they have their war paint on, specifically black and red, and the mohawks. They enjoy scalping, and once you hear those drums, it's the end. Even if you're stuck in the woods at night and it's cold and dark, you can't light a fire, because they'll find you. The only thing you can do is dig a hole and the ground...you don't even have a chance then, because they can smell you. They can see your footprints. They were the early American FBIs.
Me: [between gales of hysterical laughter] What influenced your opinion of indians?
Mom: My horrific childhood, being forced to watch indian movies. Every. Weekend. I had nightmares about indians until I was an adult. They would try to come into my house, and I didn't have wooden windows, and I didn't have shutters to shut them out, and thank goodness I didn't have a hay roof, because then they could use the fire arrow, and they'd shoot it, and my house would be engulfed in flames, and-
Me: What was the scariest Indian movie you ever saw as a child?
Mom: Well, there are so many, I can give you the scariest scene, one of the scariest scenes?
Me: Okay.
Mom: They were attacking his house, and there was this elderly lady, and she wouldn't leave her home, and she was like, "Kill me," basically, but they didn't understand that. They carried her out of the house on her bed, and then they shot the arrow onto her roof, and burned her house down. Then they probably scalped her in the front yard...that was particularly traumatizing. Oh, can I tell you who my favorite indian was? My favorite indian was the big Indian Chief in the "don't litter" commercials in the 70's, and he was adorable. Had a little tear coming down his face because of the litter bugs...
Me: [laughs hysterically] Thanks...you can go watch your show now. Alright, folks. You heard it here first. Back to you guys in the studio.

-Leighton

[please don't offend anyone, please don't offend anyone, please don't offend-]

Drawing With a Mouse Makes Baby Kittens Cry

2010-10-25T20:46:00.000-02:00

It does. That is why I am so thankful for my tablet! My mouse drawings stink. And yes, that IS what my mouse looks like. How ironic that I'm a Mac using a Microsoft mouse! Haha. I could have gotten the Magic(al) Mouse (of Awesome), but I didn't wanna spend $70 on a mouse that I wasn't positive I'd like. So, yeah. I digress.

-Leighton

[by the way, I'm not doing NaNoWriMo. The Lull Effect of the Fall Equinox has been proven faulty.]

Random Screenshots

2010-10-25T20:31:00.001-02:00

Self-explanatory.

At school, we have to use this stupid online learning program. It has some pretty ridiculous answers, which, of course, I'll be sharing with y'all at some point.

Random little 70's apple guy I drew, and, for some odd reason took a screenshot of. Cute, though.

I have no memory of Googling this. Seriously. I must have been pretty darn bored. At least it returned semi-entertaining results.

Hmm. If we're talking Cullens, then the person who wrote this definition must be attracted to boring, whiny, mega emotional girls with pale skin and the winning personality of wet cardboard. Charming.

Snooki? OHMIGOSH! When are you, like, due?
*smirks*

10:10, 10/10/10=WIN

Hooray for typing games! BOO, HOME KEYS!

Everything before the quotation marks was stuff that I was writing for a reading assignment. I think I copy/pasted accidentally and got that quote. Again, no memory of how I got it, LOL!

PEACE!
-Leighton

Happy Birthday, Opinionated!

2010-10-25T18:17:00.000-02:00

Today is Opinionated's first birthday! Huzzah! I cannot thank all of you enough for being so supportive of my hobby for this past year. Seriously. If I could give you all yachts made of pure gold, I would. Here's to hoping that we can celebrate this birthday again next year!

And hey, by then it might be uber popular!

Thanks again, everyone!

-Leighton

Throwdown

2010-10-24T17:01:00.002-02:00

I do not like Bobby Flay. I just don't. Why? Throwdown, of course. The basis of the show is that he is SO arrogant that he thinks he can just waltz right in and perfect the recipes of people who make a living by making their specialty. Gaah. He usually doesn't win, but occasionally he does. Lame.

-Leighton

Scary Movies That MUST Be Made

2010-10-24T16:53:00.001-02:00

Here are some posters for horror movies that I feel must be made.

In Soviet Russia, shoe wear you!

Be afraid. Be scared. Be...FREUDIAN!!!

...yes.

"Casualties of the chocolate war include menopausal women who could just not do without their Phish Food, children eager for Snickers and Twix on Halloween, and pretty much everyone else. Except for the vegans. *rolls eyes*"

"You've never felt so exposed."

Which one do you want to see? Personally, I think "The Day Without Chocolate" would scare the crap outta me.

-Leighton

A Watched Paper Doesn't Broil

2010-10-24T16:09:00.000-02:00

In Studies de Social, we're doing colony projects. Huzzah. Anyway, we had to make fliers for our colony to entice people to come. Of course, I get stuck with boring old Plymouth [no offense, Separatists]. I mean, we learned about that in KINDERGARTEN! Sheesh. Anyway, here's the gist of my poster [minus old time-y font]:

_______________________

Come to Beautiful

Plymouth, Massachusetts

Are you sick and tired of being persecuted for your religion?

Do you think fun and games are sinful and dirty?

Kids yapping your ears off?

THEN YOU’RE OUR KIND OF PEOPLE!

Hop on one of our sailboats and take the uncomfortable journey to the New World!

Many will perish! ! !

The adventure! The intrigue! The scurvy!

Benefits Include:

-Freedom of religion!

-No fun and games! Chores and worship only! ! !

-Pesky children don’t speak unless spoken to, and aren’t allowed to sit at meals!

HUZZAH!

Contact William Bradford for more Information.

______________________

Anyway, my dad and I just tried to burn the edges in the oven. It took a while, and only a tiny bit of discoloration showed. Because we're both really impatient, we stuck it right up under the broiler. Thankfully, it didn't catch on fire.

Viva Plymouth!

-Leighton

How To Survive a Ninja Attack

2010-10-24T10:50:00.000-02:00

(You won't.)

-Leighton

Fun Halloween Cards!

2010-10-18T22:47:00.000-02:00

Here are some fun Halloween greeting cards for you all! Just go into your paint program and edit them. [but make sure you give me credit for making the image :)]

I'm so proud of my Ghostface. I got it right on the first try!

WHEE! Jack-o-Lantern!

Enjoy!

-Leighton

Do Not Burn Books

2010-10-18T21:59:00.001-02:00

For the obvious reasons...

-just a typical day in the neighborhood...

And the librarian is gonna be real-*waves* Hi, kids!

...and karma.

-Leighton

[originally, this post was going to be about how much I hated a book I recently read, but I think I have a very high frequency of negative reviews, so...heh, yeah.]

Plaid-tastic!

2010-10-17T18:01:00.000-02:00

This fashion show has earned Lady Gaga's seal of approval.
In fact, she loves it so much that she broke her thumb.
Sure. That works.
[nice save]

Plaid. Personally, I don't think that it's the most flattering pattern. I don't like it, and it's my opinion, so don't kill me. I see plaid everywhere, and it's tacky. Have you ever seen a huge fashion show dedicated solely to plaid? I thought not. Is a "little plaid dress" something every woman should have in her closet? Only when Kim Kardashian makes good decisions and pigs fly.

Is that a Fig Newton bench?

-Leighton

Pushing My Buttons: The Box

2010-10-17T17:52:00.001-02:00

The Box in a nutshell.

Hello, dear readers! I have a lovely review for you all. Last night, the fam and I settled down for a nice horror flick and banana pudding. La di da, right? Alas, no la di das here. We foolishly chose "The Box", as we couldn't find any other movies. Anyway, it's based on a Twilight Zone episode "Button, Button", so how could it possibly be bad? *chuckles* So many ways. So. Many. Ways. Anyway, either watch the movie and come back, or read the plot here.

And to the analysis:

The Good

-The first twenty minutes or so actually had me pretty curious about the movie. Good job.
-The last scene where Arthur has to shoot Norma was pretty intense, and wasn't as wooden as the rest of the movie.
-Um. IDK.

The Bad

-Monotonous pleasantries we don't care about. Honestly, does the audience want to sit through a rehearsal dinner and watch them hug the family? Nope.
-Accents. Oh. My. Goodness. Pick an accent and stick with it. There were scenes where they totally forgot their dreadful Southern accent. Also, I noticed that the babysitter didn't have a Southern accent because it's revealed that she's from Boston. If that's so, why doesn't she have a Bhastahn accent? Definitely not wicked awesome.
-Length. This movie should have ended when the Twilight Zone did: right after "someone whom you don't know", and cue mortified look. But no-o-o-o. There wasn't even that moment of realization after Steward drives away. It's just kind of like, "Oh, hey. One mil. Awesome. Ooh, a rehearsal dinner." This movie was way too long.
-Supernatural stuff. After the whole watery coffin thing, my mom and I were like, "What the HECK was that?". It made no sense. Just blaming everything on deus ex machina is bad writing. Gosh, I'm a teenager and I know that! Geez! The filmmakers just got lazy, that's what.
-The little boy. I hate it when movies torture the little kids. When Walter went to look for Arthur outside, my mom and I had the following conversation:

Me: Oh, something's going to happen to him.
Mom: What? No way, he's gonna be fine.
Me: If nothing happens to him, why have the son as a character? Huh? He hasn't played a big role yet, so...
Mom: Whatever.
*Walter and Norma get kidnapped*
Mom: *gasp*
Me: I told you. *smirks*

-"I felt love for you." This could have been what saved them. But no-o-o. If you're going to have a conversation like that, maybe Mr. Steward could have felt some pity and saved them? I guess not.*head-desk*
-The button itself. Norma and Arthur are a fairly normal couple. Norma seems very considerate and caring, and to have such a disregard for another human's life is preposterous and totally out of character!
-The music. Irritating and distracting. Yes, music can sometimes help a horror movie, but in this case, it already detracts from the lame "scares."
-Zombies. Do I really need to elaborate?
-Eh, I'll be here for a while if I keep going, so I'll leave "The Bad" at that.

The Ugly

-The wallpaper. Holy guacamole, people. That is the ugliest, scariest, most disturbing wallpaper I have ever seen. I wish I could get a good picture for you all, but I can't find one. I think it's best that you don't see it.
-Richard Kelly. Would you be surprised if I told you that he produced Donnie Darko, as well? Kind of explains all the trippy stuff.
-This movie could quite possibly be anti-drug propaganda. "Kids, this is why you shouldn't do drugs."

If I had directed this movie, Mr. Steward would be a sociopathic serial killer like that guy in Saw, and the button is his excuse for killing people. See, wouldn't that make a better movie instead of bringing Martians and the Afterlife into this? Geez. I felt many different emotions during this movie. Here's a helpful visual:

Emotions felt during The Box.

Top Left: Okay. This looks interesting. What's with her foot? Radiation? Okay. That's nice...what now?

Top Right: Uggh...wedding? Pleasantries? Is this their sorry excuse for character development? I-Zzzz.

Bottom Left: What the heck? Watery portals? Eternal damnation? Salvation? Hemorrhages? Wait, why would you kidnap someone only to bring them back...? Water? Flood. Thoroughly confused, here.

Bottom Right: Ah. HAHAHA. This is ridiculous! And hilarious! This is playing out like one of my weird caffeine induced nightmares!

Anyway, I give this movie two stars out of ten, ten being Chad Vader, Chris Dane Owens, Percy Jackson, Harry Potter, and Charlie's Magical Unicorn Squad Shoot Flaming, Colored Marshmallows at an Irradiated Justin Bieber While ABBA Sings In the Background and the Rifftrax Crew Makes Snarky Comments... Then Tom Hanks and Perry the Platypus Save the Day with Creme Bruleé Torches [look me in the eyes and tell that it wouldn't be awesome] and the one being Los Manos: The Hands of Fate. Have a fabulously sunshiny Sunday, everybody.

-Leighton

More Treats, Less Trick

2010-10-15T19:39:00.001-02:00

Welcome to my handy-dandy guide on how to have an awesome Halloween. And I should know. Anyway, here are so cool tips to increase the candy collecting:

1. Gender Confusion
I didn't learn this from experience, thankfully. But my friend [at the time] did. She was wearing a gory looking mask and was carrying around a machete. At several houses, the peeps giving out the candy [can we call them the Benefactors?] said "And what are you supposed to be, young man?" to which she replied "*takes off mask* I'm a girl." LOL, watching the Benefactor's reactions was priceless. Anyway, she ended up getting more candy than I did. Therefore, wear a unisex costume and a mask. It's quite likely you might get some more candy if the Benefactors mistake you for the opposite gender.

2. Originality
I love making my own costumes. I have won and [almost] won costume contests for several years, but that's besides the point. You will ALWAYS get more candy if your costume is creative. Example: I was an iPhone last year. I got a LOT of candy. I would have stayed out later, but the box was heavy and hot. Anyway, make sure your costume is original and creative.

3. Age
This one is iffy. Some houses will give better treats to the little ones and boxes of raisins to the older kids. Other houses might give older kids who are with kids more candy because they're being helpful [yes, I've experienced both situations: also, a guy once gave me more candy because I was taller than everyone else. He thought I was older. I am half a year younger than the girl I was trick or treating with]. Anyway, you kind of have to get lucky with this one. If you think you're getting too old for Halloween, wear a mask...it also helps to say 'Trick-or-Treat' instead of "Hello. Nice porch,".

4. Timing
A lot of the younger kids go out around sunset. I usually go once the sun is down. That way, I can hit the mainstream houses and the richer portion of the neighborhood. After that happens, I venture into the area where not many kids live. At this point, people are usually winding down, and if they haven't had many kids come to their homes, it's likely that they'll give you a lot of candy just so they can get rid of it. Oh, how clever am I?

5. Friendly Gatherings
The houses where a couple of older women are gathered around on their porch in rocking chairs are really good signs, especially if you're wearing an original costume. The conversations will go like:

Me: Trick or Treat!
Lady One: Oh, how cute, an iPhone!
Lady Two: Awww! That's so cool!
Lady Three: Here, have som extra candy!
Me: Thank you! *YAY!*

Anything I'm missing? Enjoy your Halloween!

-Leighton

Water!

2010-10-15T18:29:00.000-02:00

Okay, as I said before, I'm doing this whole 'Blog Action Day 2010' thing. Here we go!

Water

I know for a fact that most people use more water than they need. I happen to be one of those people, sadly, because I'm really lazy. Even though you may be so lazy that your nickname is Tare Panda, you can still conserve water too! Here are some easy ways how!

-When you wait for your shower to heat up, you can collect the cool water in a bucket. From there, you can water your garden with it.

-When you're brushing your teeth: Once the toothpaste is on the brush, wet it for a few seconds. Okay, good? Good. Now-get this, it might be a bit difficult- TURN OFF THE WATER WHILE YOU BRUSH. Amazing, right?

-Don't take twenty minute showers. You're not benefiting anyone but yourself. You're wasting water and ticking off your housemates. Try to keep it under the ten minute mark, for everyones sake.

-Don't leave random cups of water everywhere, please? Stick with one cup. Drink it all. Fill it up again. Finish your cup before getting a different cup! It's not that hard. For those concerned about our friends from outer space, don't worry. Signs was just a bad movie. It's not real.

-It's really wasteful to water your plants right after it has rains. Seriously.

CONSERVE WATER!

-Leighton

[originally, this post was going to be comic of the Goofus and Gallant variety, but my Mac ate the pics. Wah.]

Imagine a Picture Here

2010-10-13T19:48:00.002-02:00

Blogger is being mean and won't let me put pictures on here. I have a whole cache of posts, and I'm doing the Blog Action thing on Friday, too. Hooray! Anyway, I have quite a few posts lined up. But I digress. Blogger won't save my posts either. Let's hope this works:

-Leighton

NaNoWriMo, HOORAY!

2010-10-12T21:08:00.000-02:00

I have officially decided that I'm doing NaNoWriMo (jr.) this year...yay? Remember when I tried to do Script Frenzy this past May or whatever? That was a disaster. I had no time to write. Due to the Lull Effect of the Autumnal Equinox* I am probably going to be able to write my goal of 30,000 words! Actually, I only wanted to do the Jr. version so you can set your own word count. 50,000 words is a scary number, and I don't think I can do that with how mercilessly I dissect my writing [anyone else delete entire chapters? Anyone? Anyone?]. Anyway, my goal is to write and not edit. I'll save that for NaNoFinMo [national novel finishing month]. So, yeah. I probably won't be able to blog much, so don't hate me. Anyhow, I might post snippets and things.

-Leighton

*Who says this can't be real? It's a fact that you never get much homework in November.

Turn Around, Bright Eyes

2010-10-11T21:45:00.000-02:00

GAH!

Total Eclipse of the Heart, GO AWAY! Okay, so I heard this song for the first time a couple of days ago. Yesterday, I foolishly decided to Youtube it, since we only caught the end of it. Bad idea. It's now relentlessly stuck in my head. Of course, it doesn't really help that I'm playing it nonstop on Youtube. Heh. Yeah. Anyway. I was trying to incorporate it into Westbrook. That didn't go over so well. It made my writing sound...weepy. And Westbrook is a comedy.

[or at least I hope it is.]

-Leighton

Drama Queen: Gone With the Breeze

2010-10-10T14:38:00.000-02:00

Way back when, in second grade, I began acting. We have a children's theater in town. One of my friends [who's actually on GNN too, go figure] was acting a lot, and I wanted to see what the fuss was about. And so, we signed up for the audition. Basically, all the kids my age went in. We stood around a piano, learned a song, sang it together, and then sang it individually. Of course, I missed my cue on the first try. The second time, I did a good job, I guess. The rest of the week, I waited anxiously for the phone call telling me whether I'd made it in or not. Sure enough, I did. I was super excited. I loved everything about it. It was amazing. If you weren't on stage, you could sit around, chat, play games, or just do whatever. At first, I was horribly frightened by the older kids. But after working with them and getting to know them, we discovered that they were really nice. Since you can only participate in the children's theater until you're sixteen, I know that the kids I knew aren't there anymore [even though I've seen a few around town]. Anyway, our director was great, and she was very nice and patient. I was part of the ensemble, but I was also a tourist. In one scene. For about two minutes. Anyway, I remember the opening song, where we had to do a wave kick-line with the whole cast. ABSOLUTE DISASTER. Everyone had to be going in the right way, and it was crazy. Opening night came faster than I thought it would. It was a blast, the place was packed, I got flowers, and it was AWESOME! I was eager to do more plays, and signed up for the next one...The Wizard of Oz.

TO BE CONTINUED

-Leighton

Miss Congeniality and The Social Network: My .02

2010-10-09T20:41:00.000-02:00

Miss Congeniality

Watched "Miss Congeniality" last night. I liked it. But it was extraordinarily predictable. I was voicing my predictions and my mom was like, "Have you seen this before?" Anyway, I think Sandra Bullock did a good job, but it was just like they cobbled together a bunch of cliched plot-lines and made this movie. But it gets more awesome points because it had both Michael Caine and William Shatner.

5/10

The Social Network

I liked the trailer better than the movie. There, I said it. Sure, the movie was great, but the trailer was just so...dramatic. I did like that the movie was very unbiased and made everyone look like jerks equally. Anyway, it was well-filmed, the soundtrack was good, and the guys were kind of cute. Win-win-win, right? Anyway, I think this is one of the few non-fiction films that I've liked. And trust me, I typically hate watching films based on a true story. Exception!

6/10

Agree? Disagree? Sound off in the comments! [please, my comments mostly consist of Onyx's two cents, and his alone.]
-Leighton

OBJECTION!

2010-10-07T22:28:00.001-02:00

Today we began our trial on The Ransom of Red Chief. Basically, Bill and Sam are trying to sue Johnny for assault and battery, premeditated murder, attempted murder, and extortion. Quite frankly, all of them except for the first charges are ridiculous. I'm not actually going to go into the juicy bits of the trial, but here's basically what went down:

[imagine all of this is in quotation marks]

(by the way, it might be helpful for you guys to know that we were on the defense. Lucky us. And I was one of the three lawyers.)

OBJECTION!

Purpose?

OBJECTION!

Purpose?

OBJECTION! OBJECTION! OBJECTION! OBJECTION!

Order in the court! Sit down!

* bailiff "cuffs" one of our lawyers*

*as he's being dragged away*

YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!

Yes, you're under oath. You must answer the question. Sorry. Bwaha.

By the way, scalping is illegal.

WHOSE SIDE ARE YOU ON?

Um...objection?

*swearing on the dictionary*

Do you promise to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you Webster?

*I explain something about Stockholm Syndrome*

Yes, well, that only occurs over long periods of time.

GET YOUR FACTS STRAIGHT, BUSTER!

[I really wish I had actually said that]

OBJECTION!

ORDER IN THE COURT! ORDER! ORDER!

PEEEEEERJURY! HE'S LYING UNDER OATH! LIAR! LIIIIIAR!

Uhhh...and then...I didn't mean to...I mean, I meant to...but didn't. Yeah, I don't know.

*everyone laughs*

Court adjourned until tomorrow.

So, yeah. I think we might have a chance of winning this thing. Our teacher even said that she was torn between sides, hooray! And, the winning team gets extra credit and bragging rights! Double yay! I'll tell you all who won tomorrow!

-Leighton

Wish us luck!

UPDATE: And the court rules in favor of the Prosecution. We fail. Excellent instincts, Onyx.

MUST KNOW!

2010-10-01T11:13:00.000-02:00

Sometimes my brain won't shut up. It's like there's a hyperactive cliquehead with ADHD trapped inside.

It's a lot worse when I'm trying to sleep.

Because I'll be lying there, trying to mind my own beeswax, when I suddenly MUST know something. Anything.

And then I'll try to fight the urge to Google it for a while...but, in the end, I always give in.

And then the cycle starts all over again...

-Leighton

They Incepted It!!

2010-09-30T19:14:00.001-02:00

*throws something*

Alright, fine, Inception, you win, okay?

I get it.

You incepted the idea for 'They Say I'm a Dreamer' from my head.

But I had the idea first!

I HAD IT FIRST!

*gets hysterical for a moment*

And...now you're the number four best movie of all time.

Go to [Health], Inception!

IT WAS MY IDEA FIRST!

AND IT WAS MUCH MORE AWESOME!

*kicks wall*

OW!

-Leighton

UPDATE: Actually watched movie; they didn't incept it, they extracted it. Whoopsie daisy.

I Embarrass Myself on School-Wide Television

2010-09-28T20:45:00.001-02:00

Surprisingly, of my own free will(no, Dakota, they did not pay me).

Yeah, GNN aired today. Reception ranged from "That was neat," to "WTH?"[heck, that is]. I think it'll be up on the website soon, but, in the meantime, I'll just share a poorly drawn pic of the Word Nerd.

My, this is poorly drawn!

-the Word Nerd

Oh, No You Didn't, IMDb

2010-09-25T23:23:00.000-02:00

Hmm, yeah, real genius of you to do a total redesign, IMDb. Umm, since when was a permanently mobile format a good thing? NEVER, that's when, IMDb. Ya know what? You'd better run, as I have a huge crate of rotten oranges right here, and, well, I'm pretty PO'd at the moment, and I need a way to vent. HERE I COME, GOSHDANGIT.

-Leighton

*splat splat splat*

YEAH, YOU'D BETTER RUN!

Good Riddance, Me: Don't Be Evil, Tablet

2010-09-25T23:17:00.000-02:00

Dear Tablet,

Three seconds was all it took for me to fall in love with you. I've been enamored since. But I can't go on like this! You've been so stubborn and pushy, absolutely refusing to draw pictures! I have to hold you at an exact angle, and no, I'm not going to apologize for throwing you across the room on multiple occasions! When you actually work, you're pretty freakin' awesome. BUT THAT'S ONLY 2% OF THE TIME! I've had to put off my redesign because of your antics! I HATE YOU. We're over, get it?

Good Riddance,

Me

[I have no clue what I'm going to do about this...seriously. No warranty, and I've tried everything I(and all the troubleshooting sites) can think of...*sigh*. Do you see what I've been reduced to?]

And I was working on the awesomest picture of a T-Rex ever, and it started messing up! *screams in frustration*

-Leighton

Nip

2010-09-24T18:34:00.000-02:00

D'awwwwh!

In kindergarten, we all got very excited because we had a hamster in the classroom. The teacher, Mrs. J, said that if we wanted to hold him, we'd have to wear gloves. Of course, this didn't stop some of us from sticking our fingers between the bars(not guilty!). His teeth were sharp. How sharp? I never had the misfortune to find out. Anyway, my mom was very active in the school's volunteer program. She was helping out our class one day when I showed her the hamster. She was like, "Awwh, wook at the cute widdle hamstaw! Who's a widdle cutie? Yesh, youuu! AHHHHH!". Where'd the unexpected 'ahhh' come from, you ask? Well, she had stuck her finger between the bars, and the hamster went to bite her.

Pretty close to what happened, actually.

I watched as it opened its mouth unnaturally wide, revealing GIGANTIC teeth as my mom withdrew her hand quickly. Later that day, we got to name this cute new pet. One genius voted for the name 'Mr. Hamster'. Of course, being the revolutionary, this kid got the vote of almost everyone in the classroom. But then my mom pipes up, "What about 'Nip'? Because he bites?". Being life-changing, everyone immediately agreed on the name. We loved our precious little hamster, even though he had an odd tendency of climbing on the ceiling of the cage. But that's okay, because we thought he was the coolest thing since Music Wednesday. Around Spring break, I was lucky enough to have the privilege to take Nip home with me. I was SO excited. Seriously. So, we went through spring break, and I admired my little hamster with glee. After many mornings of watching Spongebob and consuming copious amounts of Cocoa Krispies, the break was almost over. I walked over to the cage one morning, ready for a new day with Nip.

I put on the red gloves used to hold him, and reached in. But-wait-why wasn't he squirming around as usual? He was stiff in my hands(this is one of the most vivid memories I have from kindergarten) as I brought him over to my mom. "He's not moving," I said. Then my mom said something like, "Uh-oh. Honey, he might be dead." As far as I can remember, I didn't flip out. Sure, I was sad, but not hysterical, like when my fish died(but that's another story[and no, mom, not the beta fish]). My mom said that we could preserve the body if we wrapped it in tin foil and put his corpse in the freezer.

Contamination! Ewww.

I can't remember what happened when I got back to school, or even the COD, but one thing's for certain: my teacher explaining what happened to a class of high-strung kindergartners was probably the most awkward thing ever.

Poor kids.

And that's how I (inadvertently) destroyed the hopes and dreams of 27 kindergartners.

-Leighton

PS: Broke the record for the longest it's ever taken to write and draw a post.

Uhh...Okay.

2010-09-23T19:27:00.000-02:00

Since the gym floor is sadly fixed and we can no longer have a free period outside, gym starts again. Whoop-de-doodle doo. Time for me to look forward to sick days...anyway, we got the 'lecture period' today. Ya know...where they lecture about rules and blah blah blah. Well, our gym teachers aren't exactly very pleasant to everyone...so they pretty much screamed about no bullying the whole time. And then they'd totally switch gears to something nice and pleasant. I don't get it. Is this an interrogation technique?

-Leighton

PS: Something very funny: http://notalwaysright.com/

The Four Stages of 'Holding It'

2010-09-20T20:52:00.000-02:00

I think you all know what I'm talking about. Everyone has been through the ordeal of having to...um...ya know...when there isn't a restroom available. Sure, the easy solution is to just let it go, but that only works if you're two and under. As you can probably tell, I went through this today(no, not the whole 'letting it go' thing). There are four stages of having to go:

A. Denial: Hmm. I don't need to go to the bathroom. Must be indigestion.

B. Frustration: Okay, fine. Maybe I do need to go. I'll wait until this class is over, then I'll give myself 59.4 seconds of relief. Ugh, that isn't enough time! *kicks something*

C. Discomfort: Oh, no, I'm about to burst. Hold it in, girl. You don't want another Wendy's incident*. If someone makes you laugh, you're gonna be in trouble. Dead puppies, genocide, terrorism, Justin Bieber's hair...okay, I'm pretty sobered up now.

D. Hysteria: NO, I'M NOT! MUST! GO! PEE! RESTROOM! AUGH!!!!

Until you finally get to a restroom, it's just a horrible cycle of horribleness.

*Yes, I peed my pants in a Wendy's bathroom one time. Then, while changing into dry, clean skinny jeans in the back of the car, I peed my pants again. No, not from lack of bladder control, just that I was laughing hysterically. There are many other embarrassing, pants-wetting incidents, but they're so mortifying that I shan't go into them on the internet.

-Leighton

Self-Torture For You

2010-09-20T20:18:00.000-02:00

This year, we have to, yet again, do the Literary Research Project [dun dun dun DUN]. My theme is something like 'books aimed at teenage girls'. 'Why', you may ask yourself. 'She hates those books'. Aaand, we get to the point. Part of the reason is because I need to find out, as a writer, what makes these books so appealing, and to get in the curve of what kids these days like...but mostly, I'm doing this for y'all. I'm turning it into a year-long blogging project, where I'll review the books in my totally awesome satirical fashion as relief. At the end of the year, as a final project, we get to make WIKIS! Amazing, right? So, yeah. Look forward to this project of total awesomeness.
Excited?
Yeah, me too.

Leighton

Funeral For A Fish

2010-09-20T20:12:00.000-02:00

"-proof that only the good die young, Silver Fish passed away in Mrs.White's fourth period class. Not only was he a noble fishy specimen, he was a husband, brother, lover, father, uncle Silvie, Mr. Fish, and third cousin twice removed. He never gave up the fight, as he floundered around the filthy aquarium for forty-five minutes. He kept going, despite the discouraging remarks such as 'Mrs.White, your fish is kicking the bucket' and 'yup, he's dead'. Mr. Fish did his best to hang on and not go into the light, but, in the end, he succumbed to his fate. However, he is in a better place now-*wistfully* in the big fish tank in the sky...now, the program said that there would be algae pellets and refreshments?"

-Leighton

I'm Not Afraid of Steep Places

2010-09-19T21:02:00.000-02:00

The wedding I went to yesterday was at a chapel that was called 'pretty place'. Well, the drive was long, we were tired, and our ears were popping like crazy, so we were like "this had better be pretty" and all that stuff. I figured it could fall under two categories: flowery pretty or quaint meadow-y pretty. Of course, I was far from the correct category: RIDICULOUSLY HIGH.

Ooh, how pretty! AND TERRIFYING.

Don't get me wrong, the wedding was awesome. Buuut, I was kind of close to having a mini-panic attack because of the height, combined with the fact that my cousins and I were program passer-outers and that we weren't seated right before the bride showed up!!

Basically, upon first seeing the view, I was like this:

Aah, good times.

-Leighton

(congrats, April and Austin!)

(also, I'm not afraid of heights, just places that are steep, high up, and that there might be a risk of sliding down said steep area, as that is one of my biggest fears for some reason...I mean, it's always been an underlying fear, what with having nightmares about sliding around. I think it got worse when I accidentally slid down a water fall. That was the only time I have been truly scared about my physical being, because there was a huge log and rocks at the bottom...I escaped with a few minor bruises, but I was pretty shaken up.)

Trying Not To Cry

2010-09-15T23:10:00.000-02:00

I recently got back in touch with my first grade teacher who moved away. I was in her wedding, we went to Goblet of Fire together, and tons of other totally awesome stuff. She remains, to this day, my favorite teacher. When I was cleaning out my room the other day(I'm saying 'day' a lot, aren't I?), I found a faded slip of paper with her email address on it, and decided that I would see if she still used it. Guess what? She does! She emailed back, and we set up a time, and I just got off the phone with her. It was really cool to hear her voice again. We started reminiscing about all the crazy things I wrote or did, that kid who spilled chocolate milk all over his head(one of the most astounding things my six year old self had ever seen, lemme tell ya), and random crafts I gave to her. And, of course, I'm getting emotional. And why not? Teachers are people who touch your lives and teach you valuable skills that carry you through life! So, I say that you all need to appreciate your teachers more! Seriously, people. No hatin' on them for giving you extra homework. They're doing their job-which is teaching you! There. Sentimentality fueled rant over.

-Leighton

...

2010-09-15T18:38:00.000-02:00

Uh, I'm going on a little trip for a wedding, and I probably won't be able to blog. But prepare yourself for some true awesomeness when I get back!

-Leighton

Random Snippet-y Goodness

2010-09-14T21:54:00.001-02:00

Okay, since everyone is like, "When are you going to let me read Westbrook?" and stuffs, here are some awesome snippets...

Not nearly as epic as what occasionally happens in Westbrook, like BB gun shooting attempts, poorly executed peer-to-peer kidnapping attempts centralized in run-down Mexican theme parks, and llamas running around, but yeah.
-James

Me: Ivan. I told you to find pictures of lions. Not watch a pirated version of a children's film.
Ivan: I know what you told me to do Marguerite, I'm not stupid-‐
Me: *snorts*
Ivan: I'm just taking snapshots of the animals.
Me: Which animals? The lions?
Ivan: Yeah. *points to the hyenas* These things.
Me: *Clenches fists* Ivan. I want you to listen to me. Those *points at blurry
snapshot of hyena* are hyenas. That *points to Simba* is a lion. Got it, Ivan? Li-‐
on. Hy-‐e-‐na. Now, when you do do this correctly-‐
Ivan: *giggles*
Me: WHAT?!
Ivan: You said doo doo! *giggles*
Me: And you have the maturity of a preschooler. Thanks for pointing out the obvious [I
love sarcasm]. As I was saying before you rudely interrupted, when you complete your
task, I want you to send the pictures to my email address,
archaic_french000@gmail.com, okay? Okay.
Ivan: How do you spell zero?
Me: *facepalm*
-Marguerite

Today in Mrs. Kelvin's class we were assigned a science project. This project helps sustain growth of and nourish our young minds, thirsty for knowledge! Isn't that great? Also, I've been harboring a crush on Isabella for a while and wish Julius would share his Edward doll with me. Seriously.
-James

Mom: Marguerite, what are you doing?
Me: Teaching Erlenmeyer [my cat, duh] to flush the toilet.
Mom: MARGUERITE AIMEE BRENNEN! No wonder you're so sick, messing around in the
bathroom!
Me: The doctor said it was stress, Mom, you heard him!
Mom: Don't be such a smart aleck, go back to bed and take an Advil!
[I swear, you know you've won when they tell you you're being a smart aleck]
-Marguerite

And that's how me and Marguerite committed a crime, got away with it, and got paid five bucks each.
-James

*cue people screaming 'MORE!'*

-Leighton

PS: Obviously, those aren't the best quotes, because I'd be ruining everything by giving you the best, so...yeah.

Nothing More Awesome Than Dashing Down The Hallway In A Superhero Costume

2010-09-14T19:55:00.000-02:00

Long story short, you know I'm on the broadcasting team at my school, and I do a segment called 'Word Nerd'. We're still working on filming our first episode, so...yeah. Our 'director' bought me a super hero costume(as my segment is about a nerdy superhero). And so, before filming my segment/skit, I had to get everything prepared by walking through a book-fair of sixth graders. In full costume.

*facepalm*

-Leighton

Dancing Queen

2010-09-10T19:28:00.000-02:00

Going to a dance in a little bit....and wearing makeup-ACK! Sadly, I don't dance at dances. I usually just go for:

-Pizza. A buck a slice. Greasy, cheesy EPICNESS.

-Candy. Like, real cheap candy.

-Sixth Graders. LOL, they always, ALWAYS come to the first dance all dressed up. It's hilarious. Fortunately, I got the memo way back in 6th grade. Plus, it's fun talking to my friendly youngster comrades.

-Dancing. Watching other people dance, it's pretty hilarious. Especially Conga Lines. Bwaha.

-Music. Predicting the songs, running out of the room as fast as possible when any Justin Bieber comes on, and laughing hysterically when all the cliqueheads scream with glee because a Jo Bros. song is on...

So, yeah. Dances.

-Leighton

I Listen To The Radio

2010-09-09T20:21:00.000-02:00

HAI! I'm going to listen to the radio for a bit, and write in a stream-of-consciousness way.

START!

Okay, listening to the 'Today's Hits' station on Slacker.

Song: Whataya Want From Me

Thoughts: Frankly, it's catchy-the guitar in the background is pretty awesome. However, the cover is freakin' scary. If I didn't know any better, I'd say Adam was a girl. Nice green eyeshadow [TRASHY!]. Hey, up next! Ke$ha! Hooray! My guess: Tik Tok, maybe? Anyway, I'm starting to like this song less and less.

Song:Tik Tok

I so told you so. BOOYAH! As usual, Ke$ha looks horrible on the cover...is she auditioning for Breaking Dawn *smirks*? I remember listening to this song over and over when I was on vacation with Cairo-epicness. However, allow me to clarify before you start calling me a hypocrite: Yes, I think Tik Tok is catchy. I don't like the lyrics, Ke$ha cannot sing/talk, and it's just stupid. But you've gotta give her some credit- it's catchy. Anyway, I wonder how I would sound Autotuned? I bet you could make my totally awful singing sound good! Hooray! I think that it's sad that our generation will be remembered as loving sparkly vampires, Autotune, and skinny jeans. Ohmigosh, Ke$ha has an awesome evil laugh *smirks*!

Goody, life insurance. "Do it. Click on the ad". DO IT NOW, SUCKA! DO IT!

Song: Shattered

Um, okay. This song is giving me a headache a little bit. It sounds a lot like Rascal Flats, except less obnoxious sounding and a lot more boring. Uggh. If I wasn't blogging this for you guys, I would SO skip this. You see the sacrifices I make for you guys? Geez. Aw man, it's FOUR minutes. Half way there. Nice guitar solo...I guess. Hey, I'm having Chicken and Corn Chowder tonight! Yay! Okay, that was really random, I'll try not to do that. It's over, thank goodness!

Song: Airplanes

Truthfully, I like this song. Correction: liked. Of course, until the girl sitting next to me in the computer lab sang it over. And over. And over. Anyway, could this song rhyme any less? Srsly. And, if airplanes in the sky were like shooting stars, would that mean that they were burning pieces of debris hurtling through space? That's a real sadistic wish, lady. I could really use a wish right now: will this song have more singing and less rap? Thanks, B.o.B. Shut your clap-trap about your rapping career. Sure, good for you. I DON'T CARE, DUDE. Hey, you're not allowed to curse that much! That's not nice! Thanks for warning me, Slacker![MOM, I'm in the middle of something!] Hey, I think it's over!

*suffers through 10 seconds of moaning*

Song: Beautiful Monster

Oh gosh. Why? *clicks skip*

Song: Break Your Heart

Whoa there Mr. Speedy! You're going way too fast! From what I can understand-hey, something smells like mangoes...whoa. That's odd. What was I saying? Oh, right: from what I can understand, this guy's being a bit of a jerk...'itty bitty pieces'? Really? BTW, I wouldn't think this is Ludacris...it's too good to be Ludacris...and that's saying something, considering that my opinion of this song is very low...

The Geico Gecko has stooped to a new low.

Song: Runaway Love

And a prime example of a "good" Ludacris song! Ugh, so depressing! Why, Ludacris? You went from a fun musical romp with Justin Bieber to...this? I'd personally prefer Justin Bieber. And that's all I have to say about that particular topic.

*clicks skip*

Song: Cooler Than Me

Erm, okay. Arrogant, weird guy sing/talking to a techno beat? Ho-hum. By Mike Posner? How do you even say his last name? I don't get it.

*clicks skip*

Song: Gives You H-E-Double Hockey Sticks

Refreshingly different from the other songs we've been listening to. Catchy...yeah, okay. This isn't bad. It reminds me of early 2000's stuff, actually. I like early 2000's stuff. Speaking of techno-beats(random alert), there's a dance tomorrow! Whee! They're always worth going to, as they have ridiculously cheap candy(I typically stock up and hide it in my purse...LOL)and it's fun watching people dance like crazy people. So, yeah. I wonder what's next...?

AD:

Slacker Radio...great ad, man. Two words.

Song: Secrets

Getting off to a good start with some lovely cello! Interesting album cover with some paintball stuff. More cello...another catchy song. Not exactly a good song to dance to, but, hey. Since when have I ever been a dancer besides when I was a toddler *does an amateur cartwheel, fails*? Anyway. Why are songs so long? I don't get it. Be sure to add that to the list of things I don't get, please.

Song: Young Forever

Hi, Jay-Z. This sounds really eighties, I'm sorry. Is this a cover? I'm to lazy to Google it. Great, this is probably going to be stuck in my head for the rest of the day. Hooray. 'Smoke some weed'? Wow. NO, dude. No drugs, man. Does the chorus contradict itself? Sooo confused. That doesn't even rhyme! What! I don't understand why rappers think things like 'orange' and-whoa, deja vu, man.

AD:

Gah, 'my best friends wife just died', what? This is a depressing commercial. I guess you could argue that life is depressing...but...*sigh*.

Song: Billionaire

Yeah, just go ahead and drop an f-bomb five seconds in the song. Anyway, it's pretty catchy. Oh, and now they go and rap. All these songs are ruined by rapping! Geez. Well, okay, helping Katrina victims is good! Hooray morals! Chorus...so catchy. Hey, and stuff ACTUALLY rhymes! Oh my gosh! This is amazing! 'What up, Oprah?'. Kewl.

"Song": Misery(?)

What the heck is this?

Song: Misery

Oh, I get it. It was a promo thingy. Okay. It makes sense now. I like Maroon 5. They're cool. I'm glad that they're still together, they have really good music.

...and now, I should probably stop, as I need to take a shower. Should I do this again, or did it totally fail? Please respond.

Thanks,

Leighton

(rereading this, it was a total fail. Normally, I wouldn't even post this, but I should, as I've spent the past hour writing it, so...yeah. Sorry.)

Coming...Later Today!

2010-09-09T09:36:00.001-02:00

I don't usually have time in the morning to get on the computer, so...yeah. I don't have enough time to do one before I go to school(or my battery dies, wah), so here's what I'm going to *try* to do tonight:

-The Devil Wear Prada Review
-Dan In Real Life Review
-How To Smother Laughter
-Rainbowical Order(aka 'I am very protective of my fancy German markers')
-Fun Things To Do With M&M's

Ciao,
Leighton

Should I blog in the morning more often?

UPDATE: I totally lied. I'm not going to do ANY of these things as I am exhausted and my tablet is being a real *expletive*. Gosh, I hate this tablet!

Emoti-Fun

2010-09-08T21:47:00.000-02:00

So, as you know, I have a Mac. And Macs have very funny emoticons. My take on them:

EMOTICONS, YAY!

1. I like pandas.

2. I have a lazy eye-don't laugh at me!

3. No ice cream?

3. Waah, homework on a Friday?

4. Whuuutevar.

5. I AM A BOWLING BALL.

6. Hey, I just ate a pack of Skittles. Hehehe.

7. I am Marilyn Monroe.

8. Dude, I'm bleeding. Medical attention, plz?

9. I have a pimple, and it is highly painful.

10. I like triangles.

11. Ahyuck!

12. WHAT DO YOU MEAN, 'IS IT THAT TIME OF THE MONTH?!'

13. I'm Lady Gaga!

14. Check out my shades, yo.

15. Greetings. My name is Hubert.

16. I'm so awesome, I can hula hoop on my cranium. WHAT NOW, AMERICA's GOT TALENT?

17. I am a satyr and have not received my searcher's license. Excuse me while I eat a tin can.

18. I am a zombie and I'm totally flipping a birdie.

19. GAH I HAVE TO PEE.

20. No Office tonight?

21. I <3 being hyper.

22. I think I'm dead...am I?

23. LOL, I have Pica!

24. HULK NAUSEATED!

25, 26, and 27 are boring.

That's all,
Leighton

The Kittens Were Under Straw Attack

2010-09-08T21:28:00.000-02:00

I don't know about you guys, but I misread sentences a lot.

And by a lot, I mean A LOT.

In English today, we had to do a relatively simple grammar exercise involving subjects and verbs and blah blah blah. Anyway, I was reading question number four w/o glasses, as they slide down my nose frequently. This is what I saw:

4. The kittens were under straw attack.

"Whoa. Wait. What?"

I read it again.

4. The kittens were under the straw stack.

At which point I nearly cracked a rib trying not to laugh, and slobbered all over the hand that was covering my mouth. Quite charming, really. Anyway, here I have kindly illustrated a poor rendition of my mental image:

-Leighton

Poll Results!

2010-09-08T20:45:00.000-02:00

Hooray! Anyway, based on the results, looks like I'm going to do a redesign! Now for more questions...

-What will the new color scheme be?
Anything besides what it is now(turquoise and white). I do not like green, red, pink, purple, or yellow. Heh, I'm not giving you much of an option.

-What will the new fonts be like?
Basically, what styles of fonts do you want...elegant...funky...novelty...?

-What will the new 'mascot' be?
Currently, the mascot is the butterfly, but I'd like to get more in depth. I was thinking of doing a Hyperbole and a Half style sort of thing, where there are a few different pictures at the top.

-What will the new header look like?
Ya know...more pictures...something very professional looking...IDK. Whatever ya want.

And for the big one...

-Should I mess around with HTML and make a background?
*sigh* If you want me to, I will. But it ain't gonna be easy, partner. If I *do* make a background, it's probably going to be the word 'Opinionated' over and over in different fonts-it looks neat, trust me, I've done it before.

Anyway, answer ALL of these questions in the comments. That's not a request, that is a command. Do it. DO IT NOW!

*cough*

So...yeah.

-Leighton

All I Can Say...

2010-09-07T20:26:00.002-02:00

Wow. This is one of the webs most garish, poorly designed websites ever...enter at your own risk.

Click Here...or not.

-Leighton

I'm Gonna Get 'Cha, Roaches

2010-09-05T21:05:00.001-02:00

Indeed. We have a roach problem, so we've been trying to kill as many as possible...which is pretty difficult for someone whose best defense is screaming and jumping onto a chair. Anyway, roaches. I know where you live. Be afraid. Be very afraid.

Hasta la Vista, baby...wait...no. That's not right...*sad face*

-Leighton

Good...Trailer Making?

2010-09-04T21:29:00.000-02:00

The movie 'The Social Network' comes out on October 1st. How excited am I? VERY! This movie looks excellent. The song ('Creep' by Radiohead, covered by a women's choir) is great, chilling, and fits the trailer perfectly. There are so many little moments you have to pick up on in this trailer; for example, right after "MARK!" stop on Justin Timberlake's face...priceless. Anyway, I highly recommend watching the trailer, which I'm not giving you a link to...bwaha. Please don't call me a hypocrite because I don't have a FB yet want to watch a movie about it...*hides behind shield*

-Leighton

Poll Time!

2010-09-04T20:53:00.000-02:00

It's been forever since I've done a poll, right? Anyway, I've been seriously considering doing a full out redesign and changing the layout-maybe even experimenting with some HTML. Please DO NOT vote more than once. Thanks, guys!

Later,
Late

Morning Glory

2010-09-04T13:57:00.000-02:00

I am not a morning person.

I am groggy, grouchy, and overall unpleasant.

My hair would make Sonic the Hedgehog green with envy.

My eyes probably give the impression that I'm a drug addict.

And I'm sure the dried puddle of spit on my cheek is far from attractive.

In short, do not wake me up at 5:37am to go Yardsaling.

I like $2 clothing, but I like sleep better.

Lovely.

-Leighton

Ehmagawd.

2010-09-03T20:00:00.000-02:00

I read "The Clique" today. Must I talk about it? Seriously, If I hear the phrases 'Jimmy Choo wedges' or 'vintage Ralph Lauren cashmere sweater' I am going to vomit glitter. 'Nuff said.

-Leighton Out.

Animation Time!

2010-08-29T14:40:00.003-02:00

Whee. I'm going to attempt to make a short animation in iMovie. About what, I have no idea. Wish me luck...

-LG

UPDATE: Heck, no. Waaay too time consuming for a crappy little animation about fish. Maybe when I have some time.

Lawnmowing: NOT FUN

2010-08-28T22:56:00.000-02:00

I mowed the lawn for the first time today. I was tricked. Thanks, Mom. Now it's a weekly chore. Whee. Anyway, the media makes it seem like the most awesome, fun thing ever:

When, in reality, it's more like this:

Yeah. Good times.

-Leighton

Sincerely, Me: School Edition

2010-08-28T22:30:00.000-02:00

Dear Locker,

Lighten up. Just because you're a bottom locker, it doesn't give you an excuse to be so mean. My old locker was very nice and never jammed up. However, you seem to enjoy making it so I'm late for class after my teacher pries you open with a screwdriver. A screwdriver. Really? You make my life so frustrating, locker. Especially when the people above me drop things on my head. It hurts. You're withholding my backpack, and that's entirely unfair as my house key is in my back pack. I almost had a panic attack the other day because I couldn't get to my key. I was almost forced to hop the fence and break into my own house. Dude, gimme a break.

Sincerely,
Me

Dear Fluorescent Lights,

Why must you be so annoying? I'm very photosensitive- why do you think my room's like a cave? I get migraines and headaches from you. Thanks a lot. Because headaches really help my mood and learning ability.

Sincerely,
Me

Dear Mechanical Pencils,

You're so awesome! You make my life SO much easier and fun! Except when I lose you. Or someone steals you. Meh.

Sincerely,
Me

-Leighton

Sincerely, Me

2010-08-28T20:16:00.000-02:00

Okay, so I'm kind of stealing this idea from Hyperbole and a Half, where Allie writes letters to inanimate objects. But it's a brilliant idea, and I need to have some words.

Dear Lawnmower,

I officially hate you. Your gassy fumes make everything smell like suffocation and death. You're far too heavy, your handle makes my hands red and itchy, and you really need to keep it down. Seriously. Thanks for the lactic acid build up. I'm really looking forward to seeing you again. NOT!

Sincerely,
Me

Dear Grass,

Why must you grow so freakin' fast? Seriously. Why can't you just take it slow, and go with the flow? You annoy the heck out of everyone who has to cut you.

Sincerely,
Me

Dear Skink,

About me accidentally beheading you earlier...sorry. No hard feelings, okay?

Sincerely,
Me
PS: I may or may not have screamed a little bit when I saw you on the wall. If that's what made you fall...I'm sorry about that, too.

Dear Push Notifications,

While you may be handy, sometimes, you can be a real attention hogging [expletive of your choice]. I do care that I have a text from my Dad, but I don't care that there are four more riddles in my Riddles app. Also, can you not give me notifications after eight o'clock at night? My iPod has to be at full volume so I hear my alarm in the morning. But when you notify me at 11:00, just as I'm drifting asleep, you almost make me wet myself with fear.

Sincerely,
Me

Dear Book Flap,

Do you exist just to bug the heck out of me? I know, you keep the books clean, you anal-retentive freak. But must you get in my way every time I try to read? You're always sliding off, tearing, acting all "wah wah wah MY NEEDS". You're a glorified piece of paper. Get over yourself.

Sincerely,
Me

Dear Chocolate Covered Altoids,

I'd love to say that you are the most delicious thing ever. Sadly, I cannot bring myself to do so. Sucking on the thick outer layer of chocolate only lasts so long. When all of its gone, it makes me feel empty inside. Usually, I spit the minty part of you out. I'm sorry, but you need to change. Can you somehow allow the chocolate to permeate the mint itself? Talk to your supervisors and figure something out, then call me.

Sincerely,
Me

Dear Local Custard Joint,

Your custard is totally delish. You have the most creative flavors ever-who knew Kahlua, Baily's, and chocolate would taste amazingly awesome? I do have one complaint: why can't you teach your employees to make Peanut Butter Sundae correctly? There needs to be fudge and peanut butter on the bottom, too! Not just on the top! When will you learn? I have yet to have a single Peanut Butter Sundae that had fudge and PB on the bottom. Please fix this. NOW.

Sincerely,
Me

Dear Axe Cologne,

You just don't get it, do you? Guys think you smell great, and that you'll help them get girls. In reality, any woman in a 1.5 radius is assaulted by an awfully strong smell. It's not sexy or alluring, it's plain stupid. Stop tagging along with kids to school. I really don't want to have to sit next to a guy who plainly reeks of Chocolate Axe...because it smells nothing like chocolate. Make some bacon scented things, and then we'll talk.

Sincerely,
Me

-Leighton

Mockingjay: The Feel Good Novel of the Year

2010-08-28T17:10:00.000-02:00

I finished Mockingjay this morning. During the course of reading it, I cried several times. My favorite characters die, Katniss acts like Bella for the duration of the book(even though she has good reasons for being whiny), the love triangle gets dragged out waaay too long, Peeta is a jerk, and it was more gory than necessary. Do we really need to hear about how *beeps* flesh gets melted off as Katniss watches helplessly? Uggh. Sure, the Hunger Games series is really good, but horrifically depressing at the same time...I just...*sigh*

-Leighton

Northsound, Eastshore, Southbeck, Westbrook

2010-08-25T20:22:00.000-02:00

Well, I suppose I should mention this.
For the past...*counts on fingers*...four months, Onyx and I have been writing a novella. Last month, we finished it and started the sequel. Currently, we're halfway-ish through the sequel. And by halfway-ish, I mean, not even close to finishing within the next month (unless we let it become really crappy and random: no more 'lions are not nice nor are they mice' entries, Onyx!). Seriously. Not only is there writing, but there are pictures! Whee. Pretty pictures. At least I have a *cough MALFUNCTIONING cough* tablet. Dang drivers...anyway, we don't even have a plan about where the story is going, except for some vague ideas. We're just winging it. When we finish the sequel, we'll write the third one, which will be much shorter and the final installment. Then, and ONLY THEN, will you guys be allowed to read it. Yes, I am withholding the URL. Mhuaha! Anyway. We still have to edit it. I can't read the PDF of the first one anymore, it's so poorly edited-not necessarily for grammar/spelling, but for the story itself. Uggh. Anyway. If I don't blog a lot within the next stretch of time, know that that's what I've been working on, k? Okay.

-Leighton

BTW, can we have a round of applause for the insanely busy Austin? He started blogging again! Finally! Yaaay! You can read his blog here.

First Day Back

2010-08-25T20:08:00.000-02:00

(wow, I didn't even bother with a lame pun this time!)

So, yesterday was the last day of summer. Whoopee. Meaning, today was the first day of school. Whoopee. Pretty uneventful. I'm so looking forward to the rest of the year [I could blow up from the sarcasm]. The only class I really liked today was broadcasting. We watched a really cheesy video about bias, and stuff. And did a worksheet. Soon, we'll start learning how to use the Flip video cameras. I am kind of excited about that.

-Leighton

(that was the crappiest post ever. Srsly.)

Dinner For Schmucks

2010-08-22T23:39:00.001-02:00

Earlier today, my dad and I went to see Inception- it was sold out. So, we settled on Dinner for Schmucks. It's wasn't bad. Overall, it was pretty funny. Not rolling on the floor hilarious, mind you, but funny. Surprisingly, it was very touching, and had me a little teary at points. The mouse dioramas were really neat! No, I'm not going to take up taxidermy. Again, good trailers. "The Social Network" looks totally awesome and just like my kind of movie. Epicness. Okay. Bye, now.

-Leighton

(Yes, I know it was short, but I'm in the middle of something, okay??? Okay.)

BTW, the credits song 'Dear Laughing Doubters' is my new favorite song-good lyrics, very catchy. Yeah. Youtube it. Make it famous.

Vampires Suck...Surprisingly, Didn't Suck

2010-08-19T16:54:00.000-02:00

Indeed.

(okay, if you're just reading for the review, than scroll down past this fat paragraph.)

Last night, I went with three friends(Onyx, Gaza, Comet) to Vampires Suck. All three of us absolutely abhor the Twilight series(wher've you been, space cadet?), so we were pretty happy. Me, being the totally responsible, mature lady of the group, brought little baggies of candy and smuggled them in via my purse(yay womanhood!). On the plus side: no one questioned our age! Haha! That might be because Gaza and Onyx are pretty tall, but, yeah. Anyway. We got into the theater and we got seats smack dab in the center. The other occupants were mostly twenty-something girls, which I can appreciate. It totally felt like I was in an episode of MST3K, because we were all whispering to each other like crazy with cynical comments. The trailers started. First off: Unstoppable. I'm sorry, but does this not look like the absolute dumbest movie ever? They even showed the main characters falling to their deaths. Do we even need to watch it now? Next: The bedroom from Paranormal Activity, and, before I realized what was going on, WHOMP! Micah's body thrown at the camera, and Katie coming at us! Of course, her face is going to be haunting my nightmares for the next few nights. Anyway. We see a baby. In a crib. And a doberman. And then the doberman freaks out. And then it goes black-oh, wait, that's because my hands were over my eyes! Silly me. And then, there's something at the door! Aaaaaah! Beside me, Gaza was kind of freaking out with his hands over his eyes, and he was humming a random song, because, apparently, when you hum, you don't get scared. Okay, Gaza. You keep telling yourself that. Moving on- trailer I can't remember the name of! It had something to do with the Scarlet Letter, and it looked pretty good. The entire theater was cracking up. Finally: Due Date! Again, we were in stitches. "Oh, I have coverage!" Okay, what you've all been waiting for...the actual review. YAY!

(the review is right here!)

Okay. The first few minutes were pretty great, a full out battle between Team Jacob and Team Edward. Hilarious. I had really low expectations for VS, as it had all one star ratings on imdb, but it was really funny. 'Becca' had all of Bella's facial ticks, hair tucks, lip biting, excessive blinking, etc. spot on! The sets were amazing and looked like they were right out of Twilight(except for the Sullen's house, admittedly, the Cullen's house was cooler). It was weird seeing Annelise van der Pol in something other than That's So Raven(I miss that show) or Beauty and the Beast-even weirder to hear her curse. AND that guy from Wizards of Waverly place was in it, too! Huh. The ending was the funniest part, definitely. I'm not telling you what happens, because if I ruin it, I'd be ruining what is probably one of the best moments in a parody ever. So, go watch it! Overall, I'd give it three and a half stars out of five. Kewl.

"Hey, it's the Black Eyed Peas!"

-Leighton

Zilch.

2010-08-17T20:34:00.000-02:00

I've had a bunch of ideas for blog posts today, and I have spent a good deal of it just sitting here, trying to actually finish one. Sorry. I'd do a stream-of-consciousness kind of thing, but I'm too sleepy. I want chocolate milk. I blog nicely while hyper. Too bad I'm the opposite. On the bright side, I'll have two bloggy topics after tomorrow! I go to my Open House(goody) and then I'm going to see Vampires Suck with my friends! I'm so freaking pumped! Mom, can I make a shirt that says "Team Harry" tomorrow?

-Leighton

ABBA-Cadabra

2010-08-17T17:58:00.000-02:00

I love ABBA. I have an ABBA Pandora station(actually, it's my ABBA, Taylor Swift, Coldplay, seventies' Station. Go figure). In fifth grade, I remember being in chorus. We were doing a few ABBA songs at a concert, and I got a solo in Fernando! Whee. But, ah, my mom got a little creative with my outfit. Very seventies. Flippy hair. Weird sleeves *shudders*. When I walked in, the teenage girls in the front row started cracking up. Oh, ha ha, veeeery funny. Thank heavens we weren't doing the Bee Gees...

-Late

Tap Tap DON'T

2010-08-17T16:36:00.000-02:00

TTR is addictive.

We know.

There's no need to make public professions of love.

Honestly, what were you thinking, you dummy?

*tsk tsk*

In hindsight, probably wasn't the best idea.

-Leighton

Word to Your Mother.

2010-08-17T14:48:00.000-02:00

If you haven't guessed why I haven't posted in a while, then I'll give you an answer: I bought an iPod Touch! Yaaaay! I love it, and it's awesomely amazing. My favorite apps are my word games: Bookworm, Words with Friends, and Scrabble(even though I think the computer is cheating, even on Easy mode). Bookworm is one of my favorite Popcap games(and I knew about Popcap before it was insanely popular-do none of you remember Insaniquarium? Best. Game. Ever.). Words with Friends is pretty awesome, and I am currently kicking butt in all four of my games- including the one against my former LA teacher, Mrs. Tayloe. Anyway, I love word games. I usually don't get to play with people other than my dad(sorry, dad, but you're just too good). Off to renovate Opinionated, for the millionth time!

-Leighton

Aah, The Joy of Debt Collection Agencies

2010-08-03T15:23:00.000-02:00

LOL.

I was just minding my own business, listening to music, when I got a call. I didn't pick up, but I did as I usually do, I just google the number and area code. While I was doing that, I got another call. I tried to check my voicemail, and because of Verizon's new policy thing, I had to listen to the annoyingly perky lady teach me how to do things in English and espanol, then had to set a password, THEN I had to set an outgoing message, and blah blah blah. In the background, "Summertime" came on, and I was like, "SHUT UP, IPOD!".While all of this was happening, I got another phone call. I almost screamed, I was so frustrated. About ten minutes later, I was FINALLY able to listen to my voicemail.

Message Numero Uno(abridged):

Lady Person: This is the debt collection agency calling for a personal matter concerning a Mr. John Doe. If you are John Doe, please press the pound key. If you are not John Doe, please call 555-1234 or 555-4321. Thank you.

Message Numero Dos(abridged):

Sissy,Ronald, Hoppy: Happy Birthday to you!
Sissy: One day early!
ALL: Happy birthday to you!
Sissy: One day early!
ALL: Happy birthday, dear Leighton, happy birthday to you!
Sissy: One day early! Say 'happy birthday', Churchill!
Churchill: Coo.
ALL: Happy birthday, Leighton!

The first message were severely agitating, but the second just made me smile. Anyway, I called the debt collection agency back.

Lady No. 1: Hello?
Me: Um, hi. I think you have the wrong number, because I'm just a kid who has nothing to do with debt collection.
Lady No. 1: *chuckle* Well, okay, hold on then.
*cue really annoying, cheesy hold music*
Robotic Voice: Please hold.
*more annoying music*
Robotic Voice: Please hold.
Lady No. 2: Hello?
Me: Er, hello. I think you've mistaken me for the wrong person, because I'm only a kid, and I don't think I'm in debt.
Lady No. 2: What's your phone number?
Me: 555-0042...?
Lady No. 2: Was the man John Doe?
Me: Yeah, that's him.
Lady No. 2: Do you have any relation to John Doe?
Me: No. I've never heard of him before. [are you a cop?]
Lady No. 2: All right then. Thanks. *hangs up abruptly*
Me: Hmm.

So, yeah. Good times. I think I need to go make up with my iPod now.

I'm sorry, iPod. I didn't mean it.

-Leighton Gray

Waaah.

2010-08-02T19:57:00.000-02:00

I doing this right now, and it SERIOUSLY sucks. Gaaaaah. I don't want to do it, but if I actually want to get something done, I have to. I promised myself I'd do it before school started, so...yeah. I'm getting kind of discouraged because the idea sounds really stupid, cliched, and a LOT like Inception. Inception: I hate you(even though I still want to watch it-hooray for ruining the ending!). Grr.

Anyway.

ADMIRE MY DISCIPLINE, HAHA!

Or don't, because I'm sorely tempted to check Sparknotes.

-Leighton

Giddy

2010-08-02T17:14:00.001-02:00

HOORAY!

I have nine followers(technically, 7, because I followed twice) now! Thanks, guys! You're totally awesome!

-Leighton

Oh So Charming

2010-08-01T17:42:00.002-02:00

LOL.

A long, long time ago(I can still remember*), I went to Disney with my Dad, grandparents, aunt, uncle, and cousins. We stayed at the Grand Floridian(fanfare!), which was awesome. As I've mentioned before, I have an unusual fear of mascots. It's irrational, and I don't know my reasoning behind that. That being the case, the mascots are everywhere. EVERYWHERE. My cousins loved them, they tried to get the autographs of everybody. That's all fine and dandy, and I was able to hide behind my dad the entire time while they tried to coax me towards them, but nooooo. We had to go to a special Meet and Greet Dinner. I sat at the very far end of the table, quietly sipping my strawberry soup(the food was awesome like that) while my dad was being annoying and kept telling me to take a picture with a princess. I was adamant and refused, point blank, to take a picture with the mascots. I think I was being a little to blunt, because, lo and behold, my dad got Prince Charming himself to say hello to me. I was furious and embarrassed. So, I did what any normal human being would do- I crawled under the table. Not only do I have this entertaining story, but I have...pictures. Indeed.

-Leighton

PS: Dad, he was SO not "oh-so-charming".

*Catch that reference?

Torn

2010-08-01T14:46:00.000-02:00

School starts August 25th. I'm debating whether or not I'm excited about going back to school.

Going Back to School

Pros:
-Get to see teachers again
-Get to see familiar faces
-Something to do
-Back to school shopping
-Broadcasting team! Yaaaay!
-New teachers
-Dances/social events
-Science Olympiad!
-People watching
-Learning stuff! Hooray!(no, I'm not being sarcastic)

Cons:
-Tests
-Stress
-Anxiety
-Gym
-I'm not in Algebra 1(ignore me while I crawl in a corner and cry with shame)
-Stress
-Projects
-Meanie Jerk Heads
-Sullen, angsty teens
-Probably won't be able to blog much/write Westbrook
-Science Olympiad(stressful, and we usually wait until the last minute to build stuff)
-Being ridiculously bored in class
-Mean teachers
-Who'll be the new advanced LA teacher?
-Who are the redistrict kids going to be?
-Are...certain people...going to annoy me this year?
-Annoying boys
-Immature boys
-Stupid Boys
-Boys
-Clique-y girls
-Immature girls
-Girls who give girls a bad name because of...
-Drama!
-The list goes on...

You know, I could write a parody of "7 Things I Hate About You" and change it to "7 Things I Hate About School". Much more than seven things, but hey...

-Leighton

Punchbuggy And Other Violence Promoting Car Games

2010-08-01T14:36:00.000-02:00

You're driving down the road, not a care in the world, when you feel someone punch your shoulder and squeal "RED ONE, NO PUNCHBACKS!!!". "Ouch," you exclaim, "Who are you? What are you doing in my car? Aah!" You then proceed to call the cops, but then...

There's really no need to continue that, is there? Anyway, Punchbuggy is a fun game. Here are some other variations that are equally as enjoyable.

1.Kick-Up Pick-Up

2.Elbow Spike Motorbike

3.Body Slam Mini Van

Before playing, please sign this waiver and agree not to sue me for any life-threatening injuries. Thanks!

-Leighton

A Few of the Top 5 Saddest Movie Moments, IMO

2010-07-31T21:02:00.000-02:00

I am an absolute wuss when it comes to movies. I cry. And cry, and cry, and cry, and, sometimes, bawl. Like my 14 month old cousin, Churchill(you know the drill) when he wants some bite-sized rice cereal *inserts ear-plugs*. You might be thinking, "Oh, she's probably not as wussy as me! I cry at everything. Including baby puppies.". But did you sob for 10 minutes over Beth dying in Little Women? I think I sustained severe psychological damage from that, you hear me? Just kidding. Or am I? WHO SAID THAT!?*

*ahem*

Anyway, here are a few top five most tearjerking moments/scenes/flicks in moviedom.

5. Toy Story 3: C'mon, the whole last playtime with Bonnie and Andy had me in tears. It was like the passing of the torch. Funny how toys can make you feel that way; especially for a kid who grew up with Toy Story.

4. "When She Loved Me"/Toy Story 2: Otherwise known as 'Jessie's Song', this song always makes me cry. It's just so darn sad! Seriously.

3.Charlotte's Web: Need I say more?

2. My Dog Skip: I remember watching this movie a long time ago. It was so, so sad. It's like combining "Where The Red Fern Grows", "Andre the Seal", and "Old Yeller". My mom and I watched this together thinking it would be a cute, funny dog flick. Lesson learned: There's no such thing. The dog always dies. Always.

1. Where The Red Fern Grows(the newer one): My mom forced me to watch this because it's "a classic". I wanted to watch a new Spongebob Episode. My mom won, obviously. I was sobbing through the entire movie. The entire thing. Probably my least favorite movie of all time.

The End

-Leighton

*no offense intended. Please don't call me insensitive *cries*.

Burn. Kind of. Not Really.

2010-07-31T20:40:00.000-02:00

Do you guys remember when I was talking about our awesome LA teacher who left us? Well, our good friend Onyx emailed me this Facebook thing...pretty funny.

Tayloe Kid 1: I am about to burn my Tayole work book in a fire!!!!!! BEST DAY OF MY LIFE!

11 hours ago · Comment · Like

Random Chick likes this.

Random Chick: lol, i've heard that class sucksssssss

11 hours ago · Like

Tayloe Kid 1: I HATED THAT THING SO MUCH!!!!!!!

11 hours ago · Like

Tayloe Kid 1: the book....the classs wasnt too bad.

11 hours ago · Like

Tayloe Kid 2: I hate that thing

11 hours ago · Like

Tayloe Kid 1: who ddoesnt???

11 hours ago · Like

Former Tayloe Kid(now in high school): i love everything tayloe, T4L! u guys are gonna get a lame replacement teacher.

10 hours ago · Like

Tayloe Kid 1: i KNOWWWW i didnt hate her just the work.

10 hours ago · Like

Kate Tayloe: TK1 and FTK...thanks for trying to set these peeps straight who are trying to hate on our awesomeness

8 hours ago · Like

Former Tayloe Kid: yeah!

8 hours ago · Like

I think that the fact that my former LA teacher just said 'peeps' proves her awesomeness.

-Leighton

I Believe I Can Fly

2010-07-31T20:32:00.000-02:00

As my birthday present, I'm flying to New Jersey for nine days-YAY! I love flying; it's amazing. Here's a list of all the things I like about it:

-Security: I know, a lot of people hate this part, but, for some reason, I like it(except when they make you throw stuff away...but that's another story). It's kind of awesome going through the metal detector thing. This is kind of unrelated, but have any of you ever been to the Statue of Liberty and had to go through the bomb sniffing thing? Isn't it epic? Not that bombs are cool or anything, mind you.

-SHOPPING!: They have the coolest stores in the airport. My personal favorite is Brookstone, where they sell all sorts of awesome gear(like movie glasses). When I went to Orlando, it looked like they had some cool Disney merch shops, but we had to get to the hotel. Anyway, while these stores are really expensive, they're still pretty cool.

-Food: Airports have the best variety of food ever. You could have some Häagen Dazs, a Starbucks latte, some Sbarro pizza, a Cinnabon, KFC, etc. all in one sitting (which is not recommended, sadly- but hey, other philosophies say that life is short: eat delicious crap and make it shorter!). 'Nuff said.

-In Flight Entertainment: Longer flights have movies or trivia. Usually, the movies are boring and just something to do , but, hey, it's there(if you give me Arby's, it's not great, but I'll eat it. You get the point).

-Pretzels/Drinks: Those little packages of pretzels are the sweet sustenance of the flight, while you enviously look on to the first class punks who're being offered Miss Vickies'. Curse them...anyhoo. The drinks are nice, too. "Ma'am, would you like something to drink?"; "Why, certainly, I'll have a Cherry Coke." Good times, good times.

-The Sky/The Ocean: It's totally gorgeous, seeing the sky, you know? Especially at sunrise or sunset. AMAZING! I've yet to fly at night, but I'm sure that that's pretty too. When I went to Costa Rica, we flew over what was (I think) Cuba. It was pretty. The water was light green, and you could see boats, and...aaah. Lovely.

So. Yeah. Anything you guys really like about flying?

-Leighton

Eye Cups Are Not Nearly As Fun As They Sound

2010-07-31T20:06:00.000-02:00

Well, it turns out I have pink eye. YAAAAY! I mean, it's not that bad. It doesn't itch. It doesn't burn. It doesn't sting. My eye's just pink. Pink eye is the dumbest-uh-"sickness"(?) ever. Like, what the heck, pink eye? Anyway, my dad has this "eye cup" thing. Sure, it looks cool and it's fun to stick it to your eye and act like a cyborg, but when you add two concerned parents and-*GASP*-the dreaded saline solution, it becomes a lot less entertaining. When that ordeal was finished, I had to take eyedrops-honestly, you'd probably have to sedate me before I'd take it voluntarily. And that's all I have to say about that.

-Leighton

PS: I'm really sorry that I haven't posted a lot this Summer, almost every other week I've been traveling. I leave on the fourth to go to New Jersey for nine days, so...

An(admittedly unhealthy) Obsession...

2010-07-14T23:14:00.000-02:00

...with Harry Potter, and this STUPID, addictive, hilarious AVPM isn't helping. I'm listening to it just about every other second, reading the books constantly, and spending quite a bit on JK Rowling's site(Oh my Rowling, UPDATE for once, lady...!)/Mugglenet. I've found a nice little recipe for Butterbeer that sounds good...a nifty tutorial for wand making...and I'm in love with the sad little Deathly Hallows poster. "It All Ends Here" over a picture of a Hogwarts in shambles *wipes eyes nonchalantly*. Anyway. HP is the most awesome thing EVER. AVPS comes out on the 22nd, WOOT! Unfortunately, that will be at a point where I won't be able to watch it...ugh. Ah, well, it'll be a fun week.

Choice Quotes From AVPM:

"MAAAN. QUIREEEELLL. LIIIIIISTEN."

"That is a BOSS Zefron poster!"

"Did someone say Draco Malfoy?"

"Why can't we just be Death Eaters?"

"You'd think killing people would make you like them...but...but it just makes them dead."

LOL, there are so many more that are HILARIOUS. I'll warn you, there's quite a bit of cursing.

"VOLDEMORT OUT."

-Leighton

A Very Awesome Musical

2010-07-13T12:32:00.004-02:00

Seriously. I'd heard of "A Very Potter Musical" before, but never got into it until I listened to the soundtrack. It's so completely, epically awesome that it should be illegal in all 50 states and Puerto Rico. I'm waiting for a good time to actually watch it instead of an hour long window, but I'm pumped. One of the things I could deduce by the song "Granger Danger" is that BOTH Ron and, *gasp*, Malfoy are in love with Hermione. It's bizarre and hilarious at the same time. Except for the fact that I'm questioning whether the person playing Malfoy is a guy or a girl...*awkward silence*. COUGH. Um. Yeah.

"VOLDEMORT IS GOING DOWN!"

-Leighton

UPDATE: Yeah, Malfoy's a girl. *beyond awkward*

UPDATE: I gave in and watched the whole thing. Totally amazing. Featuring an effeminate Voldemort, a Death Eater kick line, Draco in love w/ Hermione, a snack crazed Ron, and a Zac Efron poster as a Horcrux. BTW, the woman playing Draco does a fabulous, hilarious job. It just makes it funnier that she's a girl. PIGFARTS!

Opinionated

Now That's Just Sad.

Have I Got Shoes for You

BZZZZZZZZ.

Spectacular Spectacular

NAW, Vol. 1

Original.

Bus Driver Does Not Understand Physics

The Most Traumatic Birthday Party Ever

Do Not Eat the Purple Starburst

Happy New Year/Happy Birthday

Lazy Daze: The Post That Doesn't Go Anywhere

Last Christmas I Hated This Song...

To Tide You Over

*splutter cough hack pant FAINT*

Merry Thanksgiving!

The Process of Listening To...

Chart of Happines

It Just Got All Festive Up In Here

So Many Movies, So Little Time

Eek, Braces!

Bashing Eclipse Mercilessly and Getting a Grade For It

Saved by the Buzzer

Our Teachers Discuss Us As They Would a Dead Body

Random Doodles

*drools*

Explode Into Rainbows. Do It. Do It Now.

Coding Fun, HOORAY!

This. Is. SPARTA!

Indians ft. My Mom

Drawing With a Mouse Makes Baby Kittens Cry

Random Screenshots

Happy Birthday, Opinionated!

Throwdown

Scary Movies That MUST Be Made

A Watched Paper Doesn't Broil

How To Survive a Ninja Attack

Fun Halloween Cards!

Do Not Burn Books

Plaid-tastic!

Pushing My Buttons: The Box

More Treats, Less Trick

Water!

*Imagine a Picture Here*

NaNoWriMo, HOORAY!

Turn Around, Bright Eyes

Drama Queen: Gone With the Breeze

Miss Congeniality and The Social Network: My .02

OBJECTION!

MUST KNOW!

They Incepted It!!

I Embarrass Myself on School-Wide Television

Oh, No You Didn't, IMDb

Good Riddance, Me: Don't Be Evil, Tablet

Nip

Uhh...Okay.

The Four Stages of 'Holding It'

Self-Torture For You

Funeral For A Fish

I'm Not Afraid of Steep Places

Trying Not To Cry

...

Random Snippet-y Goodness

Nothing More Awesome Than Dashing Down The Hallway In A Superhero Costume

Dancing Queen

I Listen To The Radio

Coming...Later Today!

Emoti-Fun

The Kittens Were Under Straw Attack

Poll Results!

All I Can Say...

I'm Gonna Get 'Cha, Roaches

Good...Trailer Making?

Poll Time!

Morning Glory

Ehmagawd.

Animation Time!

Lawnmowing: NOT FUN

Sincerely, Me: School Edition

Sincerely, Me

splutter cough hack pant FAINT

drools

Imagine a Picture Here